Today, after work, I was saying goodbye to my last remaining friend I worked with because she was going to be leaving for college. My manager saw me talking and made me clock back in and work, because, "If you have time to talk, you have time to work." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, 30 minutes before I was supposed to quit work at 6pm, my boss showed up. After telling him how the day went, he asked why I was still there. Apparently, for the holiday, we close early. 4 hours earlier. FML
Today, it was my last day at work. I was offered a better job and accepted. Not wanting to leave my present boss hanging, I asked for time to give notice. While I trained my replacement, the owner at the new job had time to think about how slow the season is, and he decided not to fill the position. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for leaving on time. After months of management hounding us about our overtime, I get in trouble for doing what I was supposed to do. FML
Today, I had a meeting at work. My boss was going around saying that she tries to give time off to the other managers so they can spend time with their family and significant others. She looked at me and said she doesn't for me because I have no one special to spend time with. FML
Today, my boss pulled me aside to chastise me for being "off task" because I was chatting with a co-worker while working on a project. She then spent a half hour chatting with the same person about what daycare she should go to for her new baby. FML
Today, my boss phoned me and asked me why I wasn't at work. I was in the staff room. I'd said hello to her as I came in the door. FML
Today, my friend had to leave work early for a funeral. As he was on his way out, I wanted to say something. All I could think of was, "Have fun!" FML
Today, I had a huge amount of work to get through. Two colleagues offered to help, because one had nothing else to do, and the other couldn't work until I was done. My boss got really pissed at me for "making" them do my job and wasting their time. FML
Today, it's my last day of work at my job of two and a half years. I organised to have coffee with my coworkers at a cafe. Only I turned up. I had my farewell coffee alone. FML
Today, after working all day and putting in hours of overtime, I realized I never clocked in. FML
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Top comments
Allornone 35
If you were already off the clock and had worked your scheduled shift, I can't understand his reasoning. Then again, I guess dicks don't need reasons.
Wizardo 34
Should've clocked your boss. With steel chair to nowhere. Assert dominance. Man, gotta love these haiku's.
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Comments (41)
Allornone 35
If you were already off the clock and had worked your scheduled shift, I can't understand his reasoning. Then again, I guess dicks don't need reasons.
joeyl2008 29
The only thing I can think of that makes sense to me is the boss saw OP standing around talking and told them to get back to work, not knowing OP was off, and OP took that as "clock back in and continue working".
cupcakebruh 21
Also, if you were off the clock and they made you go back to work, they better pay you overtime.
tounces7 28
Which would mean they don't know OP's schedule and they're an idiot. I think the only takeaway from this is that OP's boss is extremely old-fashioned, and is used to owning slaves instead of hired employees. That's what you get in a "Right to Work" state.
joeyl2008 29
@31 I don't see how that makes the boss an idiot. No boss I ever had memorized the employees schedules.
InfiniteSunshine 32
My boss always memorized our schedules so she'd know who was supposed to be in the store for the day, when each person was finishing, and when the next person was coming in to take over the next shift. She made the scheduled, she should know what people are working and when. Also, even if she didn't, a lot of schedules are posted right on site. So all she had to do was glance at it and could easily see OP was finished for the day.
FML_HelloItsMe 15
FYL OP.Talk to your friend on the phone.Hopefully no one will interrupt you.
thatweirdasian 22
Being interrupted wasn't the main point of this OP's post. OP was already off work when he said his last goodbye to his coworker who was leaving for college. I would rather say my goodbyes in person rather than over the phone.
writerchic85 26
Were you on your break? What does he expect you to do, sit there and stare at the wall?
Lizza330 28
It says after work, so I think OP was done for the day, but I don't think their boss can make them come back to work if they're done?
writerchic85 26
I don't know why I'm getting thumbed down so much it's an honest question
thatweirdasian 22
You were thumbed down because you didn't read OP's post correctly. He said "after work", not during his break.
Wizardo 34
Should've clocked your boss. With steel chair to nowhere. Assert dominance. Man, gotta love these haiku's.
Lalala579121 28
For some reason I read this to the tune from the Nullmetal Alchemist intro.
atomkraft 5
It checks out, you earned my like
anarchymaniac 22
I don't think they can do that to you.
GhostFox 34
I don't think this is legal at all, for one. For two, what the ****? Does she expect her employees to have no social life just because she ruined her's years ago? She sounds flat out petty and jealous.
exotica_realist 3
Text, snapchat, Skype. Don't get fired because then you'll have no friends to ask to borrow money from.
liloh_fml 11
op's shift was over. they were done with their job for that day.
Jurbla 14
Made you? As in... you actually clocked back in? Please tell me you just used the wrong wording. Once you're off the clock, your boss is no longer your boss and has no authority over what you do unless you blatantly demonstrate that you're horribly unfit to work there or just don't come in when you're scheduled to.
sungrays 16
They could still fire you, even if they don't have a real reason.
raven_of_azarath 35
That depends on where you work. In Texas, that's true, but in other states, they have to have a valid reason.
cootiequeen4444 11
That would basically be Montana. I googled right to work after hearing about it a million times in this app and literally the only state where you are required by law to have a valid reason when firing someone is Montana... There are national laws about reasons you can't fire someone though. and some states have even more reasons you can't be fired e.g. gender / sexual orientation discrimation is sadly not a nationwide banned reason to fire . it's state by state. idk why people keeping saying IF it's a right to work state.. Montana isn't super populous. so it probably is. Though on that note it's really weird that the odd one out is Montana. I would have thought it would be like Massachusetts or California or some blue state like that.
midnightm16 24
Please tell me that you didn't actually clock back in. Legally your boss has no right to do that.
ShleeG 23
God I hope your manager was kidding but based on the wording... it sounds like you actually went back to work. which is incredibly dumb.