Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, I have the flu, food poisoning, and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
Today, I was on holiday over the Christmas period and ended up with food poisoning. I spent most of the time on the toilet. I think I’ll stay home next time. FML
Today, I got food poisoning at work. I had my head in the toilet when the auto flush decided to turn on. The force of the flush was so powerful half of what I threw up splashed back into my face. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, I took my first holiday from work in over 6 months as it was my birthday. Today was also the day I woke up and vomited violently for 10 straight hours as a result of food poisoning. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from a restaurant that I had chosen for our company party. Everyone who went blamed me for their predicament. I also had to run to the toilet every ten minutes while they were all mad at me. FML
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Top comments
nabzilla 0
ooft. i feel ya. i had that happen to me once. ==" horrible.
ash92_fml 0
'wow, my life isn't ******, get over it' um, well it would feel pretty ****** at the time. sick of people like you going 'it's not an FML, dying of cancer would be an FML', the site is meant to be funny, get the **** over it. sooky little bitch.
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Comments (144)
J3weL 0
youre dehydrated
cadillackitty 0
heard things like this way too much
Mandy_fml 0
Repeat - a girl posted one exactly the same as this a few weeks ago.
mzhonesty 0
If I posted that I had the flu, does that mean that no one else can get the flu and post about it, either? Quit being a bitch, this shit happens a lot.
tokintot07 0
gross -_-
fisheatsbear 6
this sounds alot like that one girl that was on her period AND had food poisoning and had fluids from THREE holes. I think she wins... or doesn't win.
Osakhomen 0
Um, yeah that's what happens when you get food poisoning... Yeah, it's sucks but it happens to a lot of people.
lilalfredo 0
That's not terrible... it happens to the best of us. But still, that's wack.
nomnommonster 0
Double Whammy.
kwolfe21 0
that's just gross.
jayemdoubleyou 1
pfft, atleast you had a bucket to puke in. Try ******** and the puking into the same toilet with all the the puke making shit-water splash up in your face.