Today, I had dinner with the girl I thought I would end up marrying. Everything was going well and after I had paid the bill, she said she was a lesbian. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, she challenged me to see who could hook up with a straight girl first. I lost. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date with a beautiful woman I had recently met. Great food, great conversation, and a great connection. That is, until she revealed that she is a lesbian. FML
Today, my first and only true date ended with the girl saying, "Thanks for dinner, I was hungry - and oh, by the way, I'm a lesbian." FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML
Today, I saw my crush for the first time since she rejected me and said she was a lesbian. The man she was passionately making out with in the dining hall would state quite the opposite. FML
Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML
Today, the girl I thought I was dating introduced me to her boyfriend. We've gone on dates and have slept in the same bed, but it turns out she thought I was her gay best friend and was planning to introduce me to her boyfriend's brother. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to a female friend of mine, because I thought they would get along. Apparently they get along better than I expected; she dumped me for the other girl. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, a girl hit on me. Specifically, a lesbian who thought I was a girl. FML
Today, I found that my "lesbian" best friend and roommate is now dating the guy I've been trying to get a date with for weeks. FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
alien_bow 0
Shouldn't assume you're going to get married like that, since your tone seems to indicate this was your first date. However, it's really wrong of the girl to just play you like that, and then adding insult to injury...FYL.
imagineyesterday 0
#1, what, like there's some infallible way to distinguish homosexual folks from everyone else? :P
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (136)
xoxomimixoxo 0
AWWW how long did u know her??
CannibalGuy 0
Hahahahahaha you got OWNED. Seriously though, she sounds much more awesome than you, who basically came here to bitch about failing
Embarassment 0
That's a sick bet. You shouldn't have agreed, instead yell at her for just telling you now.
og_loc 0
OWNED.
umi4got 0
owned
cupsie89 0
haha, owned
Galva123 0
owned dude
Frazzle_Dazzle 0
I believe you've been owned, sir.
itsnikki 0
NICE
cinnomonroll 0
sad