imafunguy
United States
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
apparentlybutch
Fort Wayne, United States
Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML
thefmlman2011
Brisbane, Australia
Know this of me…
Today, I was going to ask out a girl I work with, only to find out that not only is she in a relationship, she’s also a lesbian. FML
straightasaneedle
Germany
Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I asked out this girl I've been spending a lot of time with lately. She told me she was only hanging out with me because she thought I was gay and wouldn't try to get in her pants. FML
Anonymous
Latrobe, United States
Today, for the first time in my life, a girl hit on me. Specifically, a lesbian who thought I was a girl. FML
The L word
United States
Today, I found out the girl I've been trying to date for six months is gay. FML
Anonymous
France
Today, my first and only true date ended with the girl saying, "Thanks for dinner, I was hungry - and oh, by the way, I'm a lesbian." FML
Anonymous
How the turntables…
Today, I learned that the girl who severely bullied me in highschool for being a lesbian just came out as a lesbian. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I talked to a girl I like. I tried to make her jealous by telling her I had a "thing" going with another girl. She looked deeply into my eyes and said, "Wait, aren't you gay?" FML
moneyman
But I'm a man
Today, I went on a date with a beautiful woman I had recently met. Great food, great conversation, and a great connection. That is, until she revealed that she is a lesbian. FML
Top comments
sikkpsychodoll 3
U shud have replied "greaaatt, im having my sex changed" lol
c2keeme 7
How rude of her. You're better off without her OP.
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Comments (117)
perdix 31
"So, how are things in Beirut?"
perdix 31
Did they get it and not like it, or did they just not get it?
haloofduty27 12
Yes.
MormonPornstar 7
What don't women understand about being lesbian, to a guy, is almost, if not more, attractive than a heterosexual girl.
Drigr 9
All the way up until the point where you want a real romantic relationship AND (or) bang the living shit out of her. Then being a lesbian makes a guy wanna swallow the barrel of his .45
Mister_Triangle 21
Yeah, I don't get it either, sorry. But I still downvote just because I don't understand a joke/reference
adamcichuttek 2
You seem to have an overload of commas, mister.
LordoftheOcelots 10
Oh no, Perdix has fallen.
perdix 31
#31, people from Beirut are Lebanese. Sounds like. . .
chell1894 13
I don't know about where you live, but where I live lesbians are not attractive. I mean there are SOME. But they're hard to come by. Most lesbians around here feel the need to dress and act like a man. And not a gentleman at that. They're mostly butch lesbians with mullets. The "hot and sexy" ones are mostly just in men's ****.
X_Codes 11
Are those the people you *call* lesbians, or people who have actually told you they're lesbians?
GypsyRover 0
I would have told her to eat my mangina. Lol
chell1894 13
Well since its to butch girls holding hand who just kissed moments before. I think it's safe to assume they're lesbians.
andrew6p 19
Im from beirut.. So ur saying lebanese ppl are gay? Or have suddenly became gay?
doctorhook86 25
67: The joke is that Perdix was pretending not to know what a lesbian is, and assumed that the OP just misspelled Lebanese.
jangalianxi 6
22- No, it's really not attractive. I support the lgbt community whole heartily, but there is nothing more sexually crippling than a lesbian to me. Why should I was my efforts getting hot and bothered over something that's never gonna happen?
shadow455 2
He should of said how is Lesbos not Beirut as the alternative definition of lesbian is someone from the isle of Lesbos meaning they can be both a lesbian and like men.
doctorhook86 25
71: That's true, but I don't most people remember than Lesbians were named after an island. That joke might fly a little higher with classics majors, though.
flyninja17 1
Me: Im Lebanese. Others: Youre a lesbian!? Its a Lebanese problem
BunchieRules 31
71 - Lisbon would also work. I believe it's the capital of Portugal.
c2keeme 7
How rude of her. You're better off without her OP.
ee13lbp 4
She could just have said no. I always prefer getting told things like this directly rather than when the other person makes stupid excuses
Mister_Triangle 21
What if she's actually a lesbian now? It can happen!
patrickalamo 48
Ask her to kiss a girl. Then ask if you can watch.
X_Codes 11
@6 - It's not a stupid excuse, she's not actually a lesbian and just wanted to be a bitch to the OP. I mean, I agree with what you say, having had more than my share of getting lead around, but that's not the situation here.
Mikeskinner 7
Just shut up
androiddestroya 7
Ask if she's into fisting... Then POW right in the kisser
ABillOnFire 15
Sorry bro, sounds like a bitch, it seems you're probably better off without her
M3741H34D 0
Well at least now when people ask you how it went you can give them a legitimate reason.
Dixbfloppin 11
Sounds like some stupid response she's been thinking about all week that she thought was cool and funny.
AH1Zviper 15
Is it weird that I read your comment in Jeremy Clarkson's voice?
sikkpsychodoll 3
U shud have replied "greaaatt, im having my sex changed" lol
ICastillo 25
Or tell her you can tuck your nuts when you guys make out........
a_lenzmeier 11
*you *should. Any one else want to take a whack at it?
immataco 9
I'm*? :D
hotshot2626 9
Yea I hear that's going around. Be warned early symptoms include heavy drinking, truth or dare, and joining a sorority.
daringtoride 27
Can you imagine how she would be if you dated? Dodged a bullet there!
KiddNYC1O 22
Probably be a good relationship as it's usually a mutual thing to date...
Krirn 21
That's when you say that you like girls too and point out how much you two have in common.
perdix 31
Introduce her to your sister. If you really cared for her as a person, you'd want to help her out in her new endeavor. Plus, you'd be nearby if she gets drunk and falls off the carpet wagon.
007type 26
Bad day, Predix?
ma77 9
Not sure if misspell or troll
perdix 31
#37, not really. I like to try to be creative and toss out comments without considering their potential popularity. If I always got thumbs up, it would mean that I found a formula to get positive feedback and I was just turning the crank.