Today, I introduced my girlfriend to a female friend of mine, because I thought they would get along. Apparently they get along better than I expected; she dumped me for the other girl. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML
Today, I was introduced to the girl my current boyfriend went out with while dating me. FML
The iron is hot
Today, my supposed "best friend" started going out with the girl I'd just split up with, immediately after she said she wanted to see other people. FML
Here comes trouble
Today, I found out that my girlfriend's new friend is actually her "replacement". They met a few months ago, and she's really cool, we share the same interests, it's nice to spend time with her, etc., but my girlfriend planned to break up with me and "trained" her because she doesn't want me to be lonely. FML
Sabotage
Today, my girlfriend’s friend decided she wanted to tell her that I was flirting with other girls, just so we would break up. It worked. FML
Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML
Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML
Who the **** are you?
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML
Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as, "My other girlfriend." FML
Today, I had dinner with the girl I thought I would end up marrying. Everything was going well and after I had paid the bill, she said she was a lesbian. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, she challenged me to see who could hook up with a straight girl first. I lost. FML
Top comments
akiranozaki 0
Well, I think you've learned something new about both of your friends, yes?
Lynnix 0
To everyone who expects a three-some from this coupling. Lesbian's don't like dick. Period. If they liked dick at all they wouldn't be a lesbian. *****'s aren't dicks. Because they're not attached to one. They are also easier to find and bigger and better. Only loose girls have threesomes. Especially random threesomes. If you don't know how to have a threesome then one wouldn't suggest you try it. It takes maneuvering and multiple condoms. They are lesbians. If the OP's ex was BI then she probably wouldn't have left him. At least not so quickly. Leaving him on the spot like that means she's quick on the draw. Who says OP and his ex ever had sex? There is such thing as people NOT having sex.
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Comments (86)
Maxine17 8
(N)
mushoo_fml 0
Are you called Ross Geller?
The_Pleb 0
The sad truth is us guys sold ourseleves out.... I mean why did he invent a strappon twice the size of ours...?
THISISWHATIWNADO 0
LOSER!
akiranozaki 0
Well, I think you've learned something new about both of your friends, yes?
LoveDemon 19
yah ...true ... good thing OP , you found out your so called gf was a les ...
Pmm368 5
she could also be bi
Stand_Up 0
If she was with him chances are is that she's bi ;D
_TheSmallThings_ 0
Hey number 2, if hes the loser why did i cringe at the picture of you in your profile pic?
blalien 0
****'s sake, that's terrible!
jackiemoonthepro 5
do I hear threesome?
Bladi_sammy 0
SeXii ;) Id ask them If I could join em' for a threesome.
xCrackerx 3
Oh yes. I'm sure those lesbians would LOVE to have a penis in their relationship. Cause you know, lesbians just crave the dick.
nokillnobeepbeep 0
It is just a warm animated *****, fully loaded! Furthermore, they could be bi. Never lose hope that they could be bi.
Taija 0
Sounds to me like they are bisexuals. But whatever the case, life isn't ****. Girls who like girls don't run around wanting to have threesomes with guys, especially not their exes. As for the OP, that really sucks.
haweb 0
Well apparently the girl was with the guy before. Could be that she was ******* him, so I don't think she'd be totally opposed to having a dick on the side.
Psychs7 11
For your information threesomes like that DO happen in the real world
Taija 0
Of course they happen, I'm not that oblivious. But suggesting a threesome (joking or not) the moment you hear someone is lesbian/bi is simply immature.
Psychs7 11
Oh i'm not disagreeing with that, but tbh it would'v been worth it for the look on their faces. You gotta laugh it of and get out the situation with your head up high
perdix 31
xCrackerx, The girlfriend was straight or bi until "Today." She liked his dick for while. We don't know whether the "female friend" is bi or a full-out lesbian. It's not unreasonable for him to see if he can insert himself into a threesome with them. The question becomes exactly which holes he will be allowed to insert himself into.
Taija 0
Perdix, it's not possible for a person to change from straight to lesbian - it's not a choice or a phase. There are three possible scenarios: A) She's been bi all along and he didn't know about this B) She didn't realize her sexual orientation till now C) She has always known she's lesbian/bi but until now, she's been trying to deny it and convince herself that she's into guys - it happens a lot But whatever the case, down with the degrading threesome -comments.
perdix 31
Taija, Your three scenarios are not mutually exclusive. Also, I don't believe that there are many lesbians who pretend to have boyfriends to appease society (it used to be more common for gay men to have girlfriends for show, but that seems to be declining.) Nevertheless, if you are supportive of someone expressing true bisexuality, there are going to have to do threesomes, one way or another. You evidently favor the TiVo time-shifted threesome where she has her lesbian and straight encounters at separate times. It's not fair to call it "degrading" when I am simply suggesting that she multi-task! ;)
Taija 0
I do believe there are still plenty of gay women and men who are in straight relationships because they fear what they are or what society thinks, but since a lot of them might never tell a soul, it's not possible for us to prove it one way or another. In any case, good to see that you're not taking this too seriously. I personally am bisexual and tend to get a bit too heated when it comes to defending the LGBT community. :P
perdix 31
Taija, I don't know what life in Finland is like, but America is slowly growing up about gay issues. Even though Texas has a bigoted redneck stereotype, we in Houston (the 4th largest city in the US) may elect an openly gay woman as mayor next week in a run-off election (she got the most votes in the general election last month and our conservative daily newspaper is endorsing her). The progress is slow, but it is going forward. Personally, I am straight, but I like justice. So, if you are bisexual, am I completely wrong about the time-shifted threesome?
Taija 0
Overall, Finland is more liberal about homosexuality than America. And I'm not making an assumption; I know the US quite well, since I visit it a few times a year. We allow same-sex registered partnership all over the country and have had several openly gay ministers in our parliament. And we have very little religious fundamentalism so for the most part, gays are left in peace here. Gays are surely being more accepted each year in all western countries, but I stand my ground - I believe there are still plenty of people who hide it, especially in more religious families. I know people whose families have disowned them after they found out that person is gay, so the fear is not irrational. And all bisexuals don't necessarily have sex with both genders, especially since there are more straight people in the world than gays/bisexuals, and therefore it's more likely to end up with someone straight. Bisexuality doesn't mean needing to have both, it just means that when looking for someone, you look for the personality (or looks, if it's nothing serious), not the gender.
GuitarJunkie6258 0
Life is so unfair!
lilemo 0
it is possible for a girl to go from straight to lesbian. that's what happened to me three years ago an I havnt looked back once.
shoieb9 14
haha... That really sucks! i fell pity on u...
PeopleRSoDumb 0
YDI it for not being smooth enough to nail them both before they left.
MrPresidentBoss1 0
if you were smart u could talk them into a threesome. your ex owes you one for leaving you for your friend and your friend for stealing your chick. their both comfortable and know you it couldn't be any better.
AntiChrist7 0
Sweet.