Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML
Today, I got a call from my son’s teacher. Apparently, while doing a test, he responded to the question, "Predict how the government will change in the next ten years" with, "I’m not psychic." FML
Today, I got a call from my 8-year-old's 3rd grade teacher. Apparently a question went around class asking, "Why do you think you were put on this Earth?", and my son answered, "My dad says it's because I swam the fastest." FML
Today, my son's teacher asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. He put down "unemployed". FML
Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML
Today, while grading my kindergarteners' spelling tests, one kid spelled all the words wrong, including his name. FML
Today, I got my dad to fill in a questionnaire my teacher handed out on Friday. One question said, "I would like to see my son/daughter ______." My dad wrote in the blank space: "Less often." FML
Today, I got sent to the principal's office because my Dad decided that instead of signing his name, he would sign, "Ms. Bigtits", because he wanted to make sure the teachers were paying attention to what their students handed in. FML
Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML
Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML
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Top comments
hellogoodbye1996 6
so it was a parent teacher conference because he did exceedingly well on his test?
issoz 10
This kid sure knows about life!
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Comments (530)
usmcFML4life 0
Sooo what your saying is that he aced his test and you had a meeting about how much of a genius your kid is.
I_Fart_Freely 0
what a boot
irokyoursox 6
exactly. chuck Norris is the answer to everything.
juturnaamo 29
Call Chuck Norris and have him round house kick your kid in the face.
iamtwiggyme 0
The teacher needs a roundhouse kick to the face!
amadais 1
was the teacher there because your son is now eligible for the gifted program?
mariazzz 5
Chuck Norris can draw a perfect circle with a ruler.
jaidonsafira 0
Chuck Norris counted to infinity and back. Twice.
alex1432 9
when chuck Norris was born, the nurse holy **** it's chuck Norris! then she had sex with him. and at that point, that was the 3rd woman he had sex with
alex1432 9
said*
zxcfghqeop 0
good tat your son know him
thebestof1984 0
You def. have the best son ever!!! Take him out for pizza for buy him something cool!!!
thebestof1984 0
*and
HannahLouise96 13
Your son is a genius.
fsaskid 0
chuck Norris doesn't cut his grass, he dares it to grow!
eklipze 0
chuck norris doesn't fight either, he just allows you to lose ;)
instnt1nfction 17
Chuck Norris doesn't bake, he just waits a couple of seconds for the ingredients to create something good
quadder 0
when chuck noris does push ups, he doesn't push himself up he pushes the earth down
teresedanielle 2
Haha, awesome!