Today, I graduated from college and my parents gave me an apple. Not the computer, the fruit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
Today, my parents bought my 11-year-old brother a MacBook for my birthday. FML
Today, I received an award from my school rewarding me for my honor roll and my cheerleading. When I brought the certificate home my mom congratulated me and hugged me. I worked really hard for this and all my dad had to say was, "Try this flavor of Doritos." FML
Today, my math teacher raged at a student for eating an apple in class. As he yelled at the student, he slapped the apple out of his hand and right into my face. Everyone laughed, including the teacher. FML
Today, for my birthday, I got a Big Mac. FML
Broke
Today, school tuition has taken up so much of my paycheck that the only thing I had to eat for dinner was applesauce. FML
Landlords gonna landlord
Today, our landlord came over to chop down our cherished apple tree. While doing so, he ate one of the apples, concurring that they really did taste excellent. FML
Today, I asked my dad for help on some homework I didn't fully understand. He walked away and came back with a huge bowl of grapes and said, "Here's your brain food." Then he left. FML
Fight Club
Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML
Good initiative
Today, I was choking on an apple and asked my sister to get me some water. She got some. Then drank it herself. FML
Top comments
andycaliboy 0
show em what you learned in college and turn it into a pipe
greatnt249 0
Is that their way of joking about you becoming a teacher?
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Comments (219)
777888777 0
wait was it a green apple because then it would be a good thing, if it was red i would say fyl
liquidpaper 0
The OP didn't say anything about expecting a gift. For all we know s/he didn't. No gift at all is often better than a cheap half-assed gift.. and from your own parents to boot. That's the FML.
emuhleighx 0
I agree with the college vs birthday comment. And also, reading this and all of the comments has made me seriously want to eat an apple. Maybe I'll take one out of my fridge and take #2's suggestion to heart. :]
GroovyPants 0
Good, Macs suck. Good job on graduating. You know, not EVERYONE'S families can afford to give people a ton of crap after graduating. Besides, seeing on how long graduation ceremonies are, you were probably hungry. YDI.
SergioFML 0
LMAO. Your parents are my hero's.
latuka 0
@22 you don't have to go all the way to africa for that. a starving kid in the states wouldn't mind eating an apple. @2 i lol'ed. to all the haters on the OP: uhhh i would def. rather the computer than an apple. you guys take these things waay to far. if i were expecting a comp. id be a bit ticked too. for about 5 min. then i wouldn't care much.
evanwilliams 4
I hate you so, so much for posting this stupid shit. Also, "graduating" from DeVry is nothing to brag about.
yer_maw 1
maybe they're broke after paying for you to go to college?
diary_of_jane 0
@#34. Good insight! :D The wisdom that knowledge must be handled with care is a very important gift indeed.
mehwhateverr 0
I don't think the OP was expecting a computer, but maybe something besides a piece of fruit. A family celebration, perhaps?