Today, I got rear-ended. In possibly the scariest part of downtown. At night. By a man who spoke hardly any English but managed to ask if I would go out dancing with him instead of calling my insurance company. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got rear-ended at a stop sign on a seldom used road in my neighborhood. As I open my car door to trade insurance information with the guy, he backs up a little and speeds away, taking my car door with him. FML
Today, I got rear ended. The guy flashed his lights at me to pull over, so I pulled into the side of the road. He drove away. FML
Today, I was driving home when a guy crashed into me from behind. I got out of my car and told him that I was going to call the cops. He then asked me if we could move to a corner because we were blocking the way, so we then got back in to move. I looked in the mirror to see him driving off. FML
Today, I decided to be a good driver and not run through the yellow light. As soon as I stopped my car another came and rear-ended me. The guy told me to go in the parking lot so we can exchange information. So I drove into the parking lot, I turned my head and watched him drive away. FML
Today, as I was sitting in my car in a mall parking lot, an old couple got into their new van and backed right into me. The man got out and in broken english decided it was no big deal. He turned to leave and tried to pat my back, but smacked my ass instead. I was hit by a car, and spanked for it. FML
Today, some genius shot through a red light, hitting my car and nearly killing me. When I went to ask if he was okay, the first words out of his mouth were, "I hope you have insurance". FML
Today, I parked my car on the street late at night, when I was distracted by a text message. Some guy then gets in my passenger side. Panicked, thinking I was being robbed, I bolt out of my car bruising my head and dropping my phone onto the pavement. The guy meant to get in the car behind me. FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, I rear-ended a car on the parkway. We pulled over, the guy told me his car was fine, and then asked me out on a date. It was only when I said no that he decided he wanted his car fixed. FML
Today, while driving, I got a call on my cell phone. Trying to be safe and avoid an accident, I pulled into the nearest parking lot before answering. While I was turning in to park, someone rear-ended me. FML
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Top comments
Ancients 8
Lovely.
FPsLife 5
Silly guy, he already got to rear-end you, so what was the need to ask you out?
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Comments (105)
blastvortex 4
For the love of everything in the known universe, OP, would it kill you to write more than one real sentence? For the other matter, one might wonder why you were even down there in the first place.
Ag11B 0
hmmm. one call would have been made to the police and another to immigration.
npk88 0
Where in Minnesota is there a "very scary part of downtown"?
ohSNAPyall 27
So what kind of dance? Did you salsa?
maniac310 2
so your saying.. the fact that he didnt speak much english which possibly makes him a minority made the whole scenario scarier? WOOOW ...
Moemoemoe_fml 0
If you had tried to use your brain, you might have come to realize that the scary thing is being alone in a not-so-good area of town by night, being in a car accident, AND having some jerk try to seduce you to get out of the insurance issues and the potential payment of the car damages. Exactly WHY do you think he was asking her for "a date instead of the insurance thing"...? Huh? People try to get out of that sort of thing all the time, but the dance offer was seriously ridiculous. Him not speaking English well was just added comical effect to the fact that despite the language issue, he still managed to make that ridiculous proposition.
protooler31 0
usually, the dancing comes BEFORE getting rear-ended...OH!! giggidy giggidy gigiggigiddy
Oupazas 1
...you were driving, right? Not just walking down the street?
HanaxD 0
I would have called the police or something.
MrMaelstrom 3
Hey WhiteRabbit, you're right. Native Americans should have closed off borders before you ever got in, you emigrant descendant motherf*cker. And right now they should close them off for good, to make sure dumb-arse bigoted motherf*ckers like you never get out. The rest of the world is sick of the amazing amout of dumbasses that the US spits out.
monster_tamer 11
Please shut up and find somewhere else to spew your crap. Thanks. =) Have a wonderful day, and please leave at the sound of the tone. *BEEEEP*
rouxvanity 0
Well...*did* you go dancing?