Today, I got rear-ended. In possibly the scariest part of downtown. At night. By a man who spoke hardly any English but managed to ask if I would go out dancing with him instead of calling my insurance company. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got rear-ended at a stop sign on a seldom used road in my neighborhood. As I open my car door to trade insurance information with the guy, he backs up a little and speeds away, taking my car door with him. FML
Today, I got rear ended. The guy flashed his lights at me to pull over, so I pulled into the side of the road. He drove away. FML
Today, I was driving home when a guy crashed into me from behind. I got out of my car and told him that I was going to call the cops. He then asked me if we could move to a corner because we were blocking the way, so we then got back in to move. I looked in the mirror to see him driving off. FML
Today, I decided to be a good driver and not run through the yellow light. As soon as I stopped my car another came and rear-ended me. The guy told me to go in the parking lot so we can exchange information. So I drove into the parking lot, I turned my head and watched him drive away. FML
Today, as I was sitting in my car in a mall parking lot, an old couple got into their new van and backed right into me. The man got out and in broken english decided it was no big deal. He turned to leave and tried to pat my back, but smacked my ass instead. I was hit by a car, and spanked for it. FML
Today, some genius shot through a red light, hitting my car and nearly killing me. When I went to ask if he was okay, the first words out of his mouth were, "I hope you have insurance". FML
Today, I parked my car on the street late at night, when I was distracted by a text message. Some guy then gets in my passenger side. Panicked, thinking I was being robbed, I bolt out of my car bruising my head and dropping my phone onto the pavement. The guy meant to get in the car behind me. FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, I rear-ended a car on the parkway. We pulled over, the guy told me his car was fine, and then asked me out on a date. It was only when I said no that he decided he wanted his car fixed. FML
Today, while driving, I got a call on my cell phone. Trying to be safe and avoid an accident, I pulled into the nearest parking lot before answering. While I was turning in to park, someone rear-ended me. FML
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Top comments
Ancients 8
Lovely.
FPsLife 5
Silly guy, he already got to rear-end you, so what was the need to ask you out?
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Comments (105)
rOBboCOp 0
thas kinda freaky O_o get asked to dance by someone who just hit your car
Whiterabbitm1 0
this is just another reason why America should completely shut down our borders!
manny0103 0
have you heard of the word tourist or resident America it's made out of ppl from everywhere and makes money out of the relationship and ppl from other countries what you shut down is your big mouth
fudrick 0
"Native" Americans crossed a land bridge to get to America, so they're immigrants just as much as anyone else, by your logic. Learn your facts you pompous ****.
fudrick 0
Oh, if you want to get picky about it. Sure, "Native" Americans were never immigrants to the USA, but they did migrate to the region currently known as the USA. It's likely that Whiterabbit's ancestors never immigrated to the USA either.
shinybluedollar 3
I think fudrick is completely missing the message here. What's his name is saying that because EVERYONE in the USA doesn't speak English, we should shut down our borders. This is illogical, seeing as how speaking English is not the only requirement to being a productive citizen. Does it cause problems, sure. But so does being born in the US and dropping out of high school or knocking up your redneck sister at age 13. Closing USA borders will not solve all of the nations problems. Not even a fraction of them.
fudrick 0
I didn't miss the point. I was correcting an example used to make that point.
lyssgross 16
Fudrick, You need to **** off. Only, and I only say this because I have a masters and have studied this for years, ONLY certain tribes of NA relocated using the land bridge. Some actually were in the America's for thousands of years. So you, my dear pompous ass, need to back off.
Americunt 0
Hmm...Well, in case you consider going out on a date with him, take my advice: DATE RAPE DATE RAPE RAPE DATE RAPE DATE. Eff Your life.
lynsieloowho 0
you go glen coco!
St0rm11 0
@ 22. Have you ever heard of a fragment? Also, trust me, it wasn't a tourist. And theres nothing wrong with shutting down a boarder. People from Europe or other countries need passports to get here, it doesnt hurt them. Why not the conected boarders?
Moemoemoe_fml 0
WTf is wrong with you? People from the connected borders needs passports to get in as much as from any other country. Hell, from Mexico I think you even need to get a visa as well. FYI, the immigration problem has NOTHING to do with passports anyway! And closing borders isn't really the solution either...
horneyhic 15
plus canadians speak English just as well as u anyway
St0rm11 0
Ughh, that needs to be edited.
NorfolkDude 2
Perhaps the guy liked you. Why you got to be prejudice? Perhaps he was a great guy who just had an accident and is as scared as you are.
EllyH 0
but it's still alittle strange approach :)
EllyH 0
he crashed into you ^^
perdix 31
Usually one has to take a girl dancing first before can have anal sex with her. This guy must have come from some exotic "backwards" culture.
CallMeHush 1
You beat me to it again. Low hanging fruit. I have to get up a little earlier.
Ajjas013 6
I think he can see the future...
me5 0
I see a happy matrimony in your future!