Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking. FML
Today, while I was waiting at a bus stop, a man stopped at the red light and smiled at me. I smiled back. He blew me a kiss and drove away, just as I realized he was masturbating behind the wheel. FML
Today, I inadvertently gave passers by the middle finger as I tried to stop my glasses from sliding off my face. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the corner, I thought I would be generous and give him some cash. I rolled down my window and waved my hand for him to come over. As he was walking over, he was struck by another car. FML
Today, while driving, I saw a car pull over with its hazard lights on. I went to see if they needed help, only to see the guy was jerking off to something on his phone. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, after leaving a store I got stuck at a red light. A car pulled up next to me and there was a half retarded man jerking his junk at me. Nasty image burned into my corneas forever. FML
Today, I went to get a facial. I forgot my contact case so I put them into paper cup. My beautician thought it was leftover water from someone else, and threw my only pair of vision aid away. I scuttled home half blind. FML
Today, after buying a new pair of prescription glasses, I went to the beach. The ocean now has a new pair of glasses. FML
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Top comments
COOL__Coal 12
I hope you waved back otherwise that would be rude
Ceejay1 13
You kept looking
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Comments (94)
lollipop77_fml 6
...and now you need new eyes.....
zandalee 20
Damn! That is one angry looking pussy!!
carbon_elf 0
Eye see how you would react that way
1soda1pOp1 6
Eww. Imagine if had seen that in double.
Ajwc101 24
I was at school.
abouttosleep 5
I'm sure she sees many of them here in louisiana. They do the above using one hand and have a slice of pizza with the other
jampang6 5
I just got so moist.
eccentrix 12
Your life sucks now that your new glasses force you to look at everything for at least 30 seconds. I'm assuming that's the case, because otherwise it's your fault for not looking away.
groupleader 7
What did he wave?
Ajwc101 24
Yum pizza.
awagh666 14
^In australia, there's a lizard called 'blue tongue'