Today, my boss was angry at me because I had filed a complaint about him refusing to change our phone service to something more reliable. Later, a customer called him and said I had hung up on him. I got fired. I didn't hang up on the customer, the phone service just dropped the call. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I received a phone call from my old boss asking me why I wasn't at work, to which I responded, "Because you fired me yesterday." He didn't say anything, and hung up. FML
Today, my boss threw me out of her office during a conference call for daring to correct her. The client fired the company because she subsequently got all the information on the call wrong, and plainly had no idea what was going on. From all the screaming, this is now all my fault. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me, telling me that I can't answer the phone anymore. Not because I do a bad job, but because a co-worker whined about it being her job. People call her and complain about how rude she is and then ask to talk to me. FML
Today, my boss called me and asked why I haven't been showing up to work. I didn't show up because he fired me last week over the phone. Then he fired me again for not showing up to work. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I corrected him after he misspoke during a meeting. FML
Today, I had to call a coworker to the office via the store intercom. The damn thing didn't turn off properly and everyone heard me say, "I hate that asshole. Just be where your dumb ass should be." I realized my mistake a few seconds before my manager stormed in and threatened to fire me. FML
Today, while working from home, I was super drowsy after a heavy bar hangout with the boys. I took a call from a customer. Next thing I know, the call was no longer there. My boss called me to tell me they left a one-star review on our site, saying I fell asleep and snored mid-call. Yes, I was fired. FML
Today, while working at my call center, I took a phone call. The guy on the other line just yelled "FUCK YOU!" twice at the top of his lungs before hanging up on me. But of course, the phone agent is always at fault. FML
Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my boss's words, "Abided by company policy to such an extent that customers were starting to hate me." FML
Today, while I was working customer support, a lady hung up on me mid-sentence, and I trailed off, saying, "…aaannnddd you hung up on me like a bitch." Turned out she was still on the line and had just accidentally hit mute. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Listen here, young people, YOU MAY NEVER COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR BOSS. If your boss is doing something really illegal or against the company rules, many places have anonymous whistle-blower hotlines. If you don't, then get an unsigned note to someone who can do something about it. Make sure you are not the only one who knows the incriminating information, or he will know it's from you. Remember my wisdom from yesterday about the guy "stealing" leftover bread? Remember how a bunch of people came and backed me up on that? This is yet another one of those BS things that goes on in the business world. How do you think the whole subprime thing worked? No one has the guts to tell about wrong and illegal things going on. You might think you are coming here for some laughs, but you might accidentally learn a thing or two about the "real world."
dftba 13
:/ I'm sorry.
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Comments (58)
OMGoriginality 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
first
xCrackerx 3
Congratulations. Is it everything you hoped it would be?
Sun_Kissed18 25
Its actually not that great :/ Oh well...
OMGoriginality 0
actually dare I say it's everything and then sum.
Jarheadhorn 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
first! and PWNED! i guess
OMGoriginality 0
LOL get sum
TenebrificTurtle 0
I guess he didn't get the message. It is not your fault. Sorry you got fired. But did you explain it--well you probably did and got the shit end of the stick cause your boss is cheap.
Geenuus 12
Please go inject some air into your veins
dftba 13
:/ I'm sorry.
too_much_fun 0
Sounds like something that would happen on The Office
allmidnighteyes 11
Except this doesn't include Angela throwing Bandit through the ceiling.
allmidnighteyes 11
I've wanted one forever.
turnedoffTVgrey 0
I have The Office board game- that's where I got my Support the Rabid bracelet. I don't know if you can get it separately. Maybe.
Einstein714 0
life isn't fair, move on, no need to whine about it
stone_light 0
#6 isn't the point of this site to whine about how life isnt fair?
AnaMaree 0
#6 doesn't belong on the internet. The internet is for **** and bitching.
Witchcraft_fml 5
Pr0n and bitching ftw. And the intellectually-challenged people like me who like to look at brainless, hilarious pictures. :]
TenebrificTurtle 0
I just got on this site and i love it. I feel better about my life already. And if I didn't think my life sucked already, if I ever get a post on then I can get torn apart by jerks when all I want is someone to UNDERSTAND... sob #6, you just have to undermine yourself. Why are you one here if you don't think people should whine?
ruben7467 0
why didn't you call the customer back.. YDI for not following up..
your_face 15
I was kind of thinking the same thing, but it's possible that the company doesn't record the numbers that call them, because a) that would be a lot of numbers to record and b) it might make callers nervous about their numbers being sold. I mean it seems like you should at least be able to use *69, but there might be a company policy against it. Or maybe the customer immediately called the boss, so the OP got a busy signal when he called back. You also could have gone straight to the boss to tell him what had happened... but again, in the case of the customer immediately calling him you'd still be screwed. Sorry, dude.
Labamba 0
you could of called back....sorry to hear that
Chocolate_Chunk 2
You should of lernid engleesh
Luckster 0
That is just messed up...
jessxoxo28 5
wow that blows big time ur boss is an ass
perdix 31
Listen here, young people, YOU MAY NEVER COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR BOSS. If your boss is doing something really illegal or against the company rules, many places have anonymous whistle-blower hotlines. If you don't, then get an unsigned note to someone who can do something about it. Make sure you are not the only one who knows the incriminating information, or he will know it's from you. Remember my wisdom from yesterday about the guy "stealing" leftover bread? Remember how a bunch of people came and backed me up on that? This is yet another one of those BS things that goes on in the business world. How do you think the whole subprime thing worked? No one has the guts to tell about wrong and illegal things going on. You might think you are coming here for some laughs, but you might accidentally learn a thing or two about the "real world."
Witchcraft_fml 5
Nooo I don't want to learn! And now I am dead. You've killed me with knowledge, Perdix. :/
perdix 31
Trust me, when you get into the "real world," you start getting a lot of FMLs regarding the ******-up nature of the business world. Please come haunt me at my office and you will see what you mean. I don't think we are serious about the "No-Ghost" policy.
Witchcraft_fml 5
I've seen a lot of horrifying crap that goes on in daycares. Now, if I had one, I'd be terrified to put my kid in daycare. :/ Maybe I will. I'm your new stalker-ghost, and you can't get rid of me. :]
perdix 31
Actually that sounds pretty good. I have to spend a lot of time alone at work and some time with some rather boring people, so having a lively spirit around is most welcome. Can you invent shit? I would try to give you credit for the stuff we come up with, but I am afraid the Patent Office won't let me have a ghost that sounds like Catherine Zeta-Jones as a co-inventor, even though we know the truth. ;) Maybe you can roam around the spirit world and get Archimedes, Da Vinci, Edison, Tesla, the Wright Brothers, etc. to look at my work and brainstorm ideas. This could be great!
Witchcraft_fml 5
Don't worry, I'll scare all the boring people away with my frightening hauntings! Oh, yes, I can definitely invent things! I co-created and helped experiment with a wonderful, stomach-filling, tastebud-satisfying creation just a few weeks ago, in fact, with a very clever man! Boo, Catherine Zeta. My lack of faith in her husband's "acting" skills has resulted in somewhat of a grudge against her. :/ I might have to go haunt her, too, but in a bad, spooky way. P.S. I talked to Archimedes about it, but he told me to **** off. How very rude.
perdix 31
Oh, Witchy-ghost! Thanks for the effort. I'm impressed that you know ancient Greek. Did you see that example of corporate waste I just experienced? Of course, you did, you're an all-seeing ghost. We just moved offices and have hundreds of nice cardboard boxes that we have emptied. What did we do with the empties? Did we sell them? Recycle them? Give them to another department in our company? Noooooooooooo! We just tossed them into the Dumpster. I objected, but once I realized that no one else cared, I just shut the F up.
Witchcraft_fml 5
It's true. I'm also fluent in Latin...though when I speak it, people throw stones at me. :[ I did see that, and I got angry on your behalf. Don't worry, though...I've sent a few malicious spooks (think Genghis Khan-type ghosts) over to your co-workers' houses to give them a little...erm...surprise tonight. Pretend you know nothing in the morning when your co-workers complain about being raped and pillaged the night before. :] If you want, I can slip a few drugs from beyond the grave into their morning coffee so that you can have free-reign over their actions. Why just stop at making them recycle cardboard boxes? You could take over the company! But think of the possibilities those cardboard boxes could have served! Massive fort? Home for a hobo? The "box" in a box of kittens?
perdix 31
Witchy-ghost, you are awesome! This morning when I came in to work, I had eight cups of steaming hot coffee on my desk and many donuts all with notes saying "Please make it stop!" I used to be very good in Latin, but never spoke it. Mostly I scanned the Aeneid for meter and identified the poetic devices. I considered having Classics as my second major, but I did not like the faculty of the department. I am so rusty in it now. Keep working at the Latin, though, it seems to do great things for your brain. But who am I to tell you when you can ask Great Caesar's Ghost?
Witchcraft_fml 5
Why thank you...Perdy-live? Perdy-solid? Nope, can't think of anything cute. :[ Oh, good, so it's working! Genghis told me last night that he and his minions went ape-shit on your co-workers, even more so than when he was alive. I'm glad he refrained from killing them, though, I don't want to meet them on this side yet! They sound too dull. Well, that's impressive! At least you can speak some of it, it tends to astound people! How much of it do you know? I'll let you in on a little secret, though... When you die, you are automatically knowledgeable in Latin, because it's necessary to communicate with anyone who's anyone on the other side. I must warn you though, if you try to talk to Caesar, make sure you enunciate your words. If not, he'll scream at you.