Today, I got a new girlfriend. Unfortunately, the last girl I asked out just responded to my relationship request on Facebook. It's been 4 hours, and my new girlfriend already thinks I'm cheating on her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML
Today, I rejected a girl I work with because I have a girlfriend. That girl then posted on Facebook that she'd friendzoned me for being creepy. My girlfriend saw the post, believed it, and dumped me. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask my crush out. Also today, she changed her Facebook status to "In a relationship." I'm so damn lonely. FML
Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML
Today, the girl that I had a crush on for over a year, from whom I recently moved on from, told me that she likes me. I’m dating a new girl. FML
Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my Facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via Facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML
Today, after dating my girlfriend for about a month, she changed her Facebook status to taken. When I saw the update, I immediately clicked "Like." Then I looked up and saw I wasn't the person she had put herself in a relationship with. FML
Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her Facebook status changed to "In a relationship." This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML
Today, I changed my Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship." The girl is made up and the picture is from Google. FML
Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML
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Top comments
qt_314 5
Did you ask these girls out over Facebook...
kAPISH 29
Wait... did you ask her out by a relationship status on FACEBOOK?! What has the world come to...
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Comments (79)
Tristyxxx 24
it didn't occur to just ask?
rocketiquette 20
I literally have no words... Like did OP never speak to this girl like "hey I like you, let's date", so he just sent a relationship request??? And didn't think to... Oh I dunno.... Cancel the request? Or better yet not have used it as a pick up line?! My god.
taylorgangg 9
How many girls have you asked out? You must really need a girlfriend
ninjapiratejesus_fml 20
Something about the way he said "Today, I got a new girlfriend" makes it sound like he just went down to the store and purchased her. Like the old one broke or something.
Carmstro 13
1, OP says "The last girl I asked out" and he never said that he asked her via Facebook. He would have asked her out then made a relationship request (little fast if you ask me) but the girl didn't respond until it was a little late in the game. The problem here is that THAT girl still thinks she and OP are in a relationship, so other than sorting out the cheating bit, OP should also sort out that miscommunication error.
krushr 3
22, slight correction: you literally have 51 words.
poccocurantes 7
Let me just put this out there. I am single and looking for a relationship. if you are interested just get back to me sometime in the future, maybe a month or two, and let me know we are in a relationship. *This is the Internet, so yes I am joking.
rocketiquette 20
60- righto chap.
longtimesunshine 4
Iloveyou
sens3sfailing 25
I love you too.
poccocurantes 7
I'm feelin the love.
dead247 13
#46 you start every post with "today" on fml.
dannykilljoy 4
112 -_- just.. God you're stupid..
qt_314 5
Did you ask these girls out over Facebook...
MrBrightside21 20
I usually use World Of Warcraft. But one time I went out with a centaur. Turned out she was a man, who cheated on me. Filthy Manwhorse.
PenguinBitch 44
24- This reminds me of how Ted asked this girl out on How I Met Your Mother.
oj101 33
Who said romance was dead?
IOmnomHard 10
24-I feel totally nerdy correcting you but, they're called Tauren. And they're actually part cow.
MrBrightside21 20
47 - Mr. Tumnus and that centaur from Harry Potter say they disagree.
tjv3 10
Does that even count lol
Axipiter 24
Mr. Tumnus ia a faun...
MrBrightside21 20
61 - Are you saying Mr. Tumnus is wrong? Google agrees with him too. Centaur - In Greek mythology, a centaur (from Greek: Κένταυρος, Kéntauros) or hippocentaur is a member of a composite race of creatures, part human and part horse. Mr. Tumnus is never wrong, sir.
AurumPotestasEst 16
Mr. Tumnus isn't a centaur... he's a faun.
MrBrightside21 20
I am aware of Mr. Tumnus being a faun. I was implying that Mr. Tumnus knows what he's saying because he is a hybrid. I have read every single book from Narnia and did my 4th grade book report on The Witch and the Wardrobe. Now let's all just go back to playing WoW and act like this never happened.
SoSickWithIt 14
I ******* love WoW. I have a beloved rogue, I stalk people on my hunter, I heal shit all day with my paladin, I've neglected my death knight though.. But I'm currently leveling a shaman, and I use to have a level capped Druid, and a Mage.. My e-penis was huge gais.
PenguinBitch 44
^So much nerd radiating from this guy. >.>
dontpanic_fml 32
It's The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe and any halfway fan of The Chronicles of Narnia knows that. Alright, I'm not saying you're not, but seriously. If you know the books like you say you do there is NO WAY you would ever, ever make that mistake. And for anyone who's confused or wondering, Mr. Tumnus is a faun.
wallandpiece 16
I'm pretty sure Mr Tumnus is half-goat, half-human which has nothing to do with being part-horse..
dead247 13
Faun
negb 30
After I read this whole conversation, I forgot what the FML was about.
octopussperm125 18
Are we able to stick our dicks in computers yet and **** those instead of people? B/c it seems like alot people would never leave the house
kAPISH 29
Wait... did you ask her out by a relationship status on FACEBOOK?! What has the world come to...
kAPISH 29
It still makes no sense, it seemed like it took some time for her to respond. And then, shouldn't you atleast talk to her before sending a relationship status to her? Since it seems she werent aware of it or just ignored it? He should've cancelled it or something. I mean what...
tek55 3
Who requests a relationship status after just asking a girl out? Notice he didn't say last girl I took out or dated.
TheNewGuy03 29
If I had to read between the lines, the two conversed in real life, and OP developed a liking for this chick. Consequently, he sent her a Facebook relationship request after some time passed, but unfortunately, the lady he was interested in seemingly refused the request. Fast-forward to present day. OP meets a new girl, sees that she's amiable, and decides that she is the one with whom he wants to be in a relationship. Shortly after making it official, ol' girl decides that she wants to accept the request, unbeknownst to OP. Clusterfuck cheating scandal ensues. OP, get in here and clarify this shit, before I write a book.
Winner12321 3
*checks out profile picture* "good enough" *sends relationship request*
zoPwNAgEzo 21
Wtf? Wouldn't you normally talk to the person before sending them a relationship status? Obviously you two didn't hit it off well if you already have a new girlfriend
prestigion 4
Did you ask her out with a Facebook request? It's ok that's hardly a girlfriend hahaha you're not cheating.
Dusty_Busters 15
Yea how sad
dirton89 7
Well, George...you got some explaining or some fixing to do before this becomes some odd love triangle...or just simply end up alone.
emilyjgraham 34
6, your expression fits perfectly with what you said!
rokahh 2
It wouldn't be a triangle unless OP's new girlfriend has the hots for the other chick. It's more of a love-line.
thatgaychick 9
This is why we always wait 3 days OP
_shakalaka_ 9
You're such a player!
TinyGiant 4
If George is 12 this FML kind of makes sense
tybird 6
3 way?