Today, I was in church. During the prayer, I moved my foot and it pressed against the automatic button on my umbrella causing it to suddenly open. As if that wasn't bad enough, I screamed simultaneously at the shock. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I entered a stairwell, the fire alarm went off, triggering the automatic fire doors to close. The one I was walking through ran over my foot, ripping my toenail, and then smacked me in the face. FML
Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML
Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML
Today, I sneaked out of work early. I tripped over my own feet while walking up to my car. As I fell, I managed to hit the panic button on my car keys, setting off my car alarm while I lay flat on the ground in the parking lot. FML
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Today, I tripped while rushing to my classes. In a desperate attempt to regain my balance, I grabbed the nearest thing to me. A fire alarm. FML
Today, I tried to open a door with a dramatic kick, like in the movies. The door didn’t budge, but my shoe flew off and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I tried to quietly leave a public toilet at work without anyone noticing how long I'd been in there. The automatic hand dryer turned on as I walked past, making me jump so hard, I walked straight into the door. FML
Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML
Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML
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Top comments
teentee401 37
Did you at least scream "HOLY SHIT"?
HoboMeth 36
Pray people don't get mad
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Comments (61)
teentee401 37
Did you at least scream "HOLY SHIT"?
FitFriday 32
Other options OP could've said, "Oh My God" or "Jesus" or "Holy cow".
HoboMeth 36
Pray people don't get mad
tantanpanda 26
Nah, they have to forgive.
Kevin_Kestel 24
It's happened to me
ladyLALAA 29
Doubtful
jake_braves 25
I'm sorry OP, that's really embarrassing. But it's okay. They'll forgive you if they are true believers.
Shine242 17
Omg I'm so sorry. But I actually laughed out loud. This is something that would happen to me.
MandieL 27
I did too, and then I felt bad so I had to come see if others did too. Glad to see there are a few. I'm sure no one was mad OP, probably gave them a little chuckle. Try not to be embarrassed, shit happens.
MandieL 27
My go to scream is "Jesus Christ". Don't know why, that's just what pops out of my mouth (I blame my grandma) so it could have been worse too OP.
Glynnis62 13
I'm sorry that happened OP but that made me laugh...I'm so sorry xD
cacheson 42
You should have played it off as a sign from God!
ThrottleJockey 36
He certainly has a sense of humor.
sunsetium 14
Maybe it was a sign telling you that going to church will bring bad luck! just kidding hehehe
Schmavid64 13
Accidents happen. I'm sure no one minded too much.
Tripartita 45
Normally you'd be right, but in a church, the open umbrella would act as a parabolic dish to hyper-focus the Holy Spirit. I go into expensive detail on this in my science x religion romfic.