Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML
Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke, and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
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Top comments
AliMarie 0
Uh. . .this just confuses me.
Tribulations 0
That is undoubtedly the worst tattoo ever worn by anyone ever.
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Comments (100)
AliMarie 0
Uh. . .this just confuses me.
Exiro2 0
The only explanation I can find is that she used too much LSD which caused the scorpion to become a real spider.
analo_fml 8
IMAO !
mac222 0
her life is so pathetic she added that so we didn't think she was a complete idiot
needsagf14 12
they thought it was a spider on their wrist where the scorpion was
cre8or99 0
ok I get it now she got the tattoo on her wrist and while she was in the shower she got a shock (a shock like when u rub the carppet with socks on and touch someone) she then looked down at her wrist and saw the spider/Scorpion and thinking it was real and what bit her she got scared and fell your welcome
ZombieFetus322 5
Actually, I think OP means she forgot about the tattoo and when she saw it she thought it was a spider and that shocked her (as in surprised not literally shocked) causing her to slip.
LoveDemon 19
haha ... time you knew the difference between a tattoo and the real thing ... :D
fmlizdabest 0
lol
fakepolice 0
not free when u buy the bag of chips... oh and FAIL!!!
countrygal926 0
What exactly do your temporary tattoo and you slippin in the shower have in common?
BritishHobo 0
Really?
PandaPandaPandaX 0
When #4 posted their comment, they couldn't possibly have read #5...
annabelle2213 0
hahah, facepalm!
yehr 0
she probably forgot about it then saw it out of the corner of her eye and her first would be spider cause they're more common. LMAO this made me cack!!!
darkheadlights 4
She mistook the scorpion tattoo for a spider on her wrist. At least that's how I understood it.
andydawg8891 0
*eyeroll* Women I don't say that because I really feel that way. I say it because I like watching people fight.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
Have at you, then. (raises fisticuffs in old-Irish posture)
Life_is_FML 22
Wow you really must be sooo bored that you have to make a rude comment just to be an a**hole. Grow up and get a life please.
Tribulations 0
That is undoubtedly the worst tattoo ever worn by anyone ever.
Mc09toofine 0
i don't understand this ydi for how badly written this fml is!
fringle 0
I didn't get it either at first but I think she got scared from her tattoo.
blastvortex 4
Be wary of that great, big dark thing that sometimes creeps along your walls and floors as well! It's stalking you!