Today, I found out where my sister's pet lizard escaped to. I also found out that the little shit likes to hide in dark, cold places. I discovered this when I heard the bastard squeal as I started the lawnmower. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, I accidentally left my sister's hamster's cage open and it escaped. My dad recently put mouse traps down. Guess where I found her. FML
Today, my mother found my escaped pet snake after she had already washed and dried it with the laundry. FML
Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML
Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML
Get back
Today, my cat escaped through my front door. It was dark out, so I had no idea where I was going. I finally caught up to him in my neighbour’s lawn and I gave him heck for scaring me. It took me a minute to realize I was actually talking to a bush in their flowerbed. FML
Wrecked
Today, my family came back from holiday to discover that my little sister had messed with the cat flap before we left. Several stray cats were able to come in, but were unable to get out, and left shit in various areas around the house. FML
I'm Jim Morrison, I'm Dead
Today, a lizard got caught in some loose duct tape in my office. A perk of working alone, I get to clean up. Lizards scare the Bejeezus out of me. FML
Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML
Today, I found my pet hamster that escaped yesterday, wet and soggy, next to my pet dog. My dog chewed it. FML
Top comments
DeltaDragonxx 20
At least he won't try to sell you car insurance anymorel
quickit 24
OP you're a coldblooded murderer.
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Comments (80)
quickit 24
OP you're a coldblooded murderer.
ochaa28 19
literally lol
Abhinow 7
or murderer of cold blooded
Leenah_93 11
I don't know what's with all the downvotes. When #31 said "literally" she meant the lizard (they're cold blooded), though OP didn't really mention anything about the lizard's death so...
PhinIt2WinIt 24
yikes.. I just mowed the lawn too and this sorta made me think of what might've been in the mower..
CheekyRaccoon 27
That would be grass.
esamolwan 18
HOLY SHITT
XxGaLaXy_HiTzxX 14
Savage
DeltaDragonxx 20
At least he won't try to sell you car insurance anymorel
Alup132 22
Well, it's a lizard here, but hey, close relative as?
DoomSkuller 28
geckos are a type of lizard.
sweetbliss3 37
poor little lizard. how sad. :-/
Afroninja4566 21
Best thing to do now is to tell her, and also that there was now way to avoid that.
amanda182 19
..if you told your little sister you ran over her pet she would be devastated. It's better to let her think he just escaped.. Then it's more of a mystery, instead of hey your pet just got chopped up by the lawn mower.
Fluffy_Whiskers 5
Well if OP cares about trust and stuff they should tell her. It's better if she finds out now than many years from now...
amanda182 19
If she finds out years from now she'd be older and more mature. She'd probably laugh at the situation. I have a 5 year old niece and if I told her I ran her pet over with a lawn mower she would be pissed
Hiimhaileypotter 53
#55 What kind of ****** up logic do you use? Even years from now she probably wouldn't laugh about her pet getting ripped to shreds by a lawn mower unless she's extremely ****** up. To most normal people, this situation would be horrible even years down the road...
DocBastard 40
Reptiles are not pets. My brother had a "pet" snake growing up, and I can't even count the number of times I wish I could have run over that evil ****** with a lawnmower. The snake, not the brother. Although my brother was pretty evil too. **** reptiles.
leogachi 15
Why aren't they pets? Just because you don't like them? I hate snakes, too, but to tell someone else that they shouldn't have one because "they aren't pets" is absurd.
zeffra13 31
Any animal you keep in your house, feed, and let's you pet/hold it and maybe even play with, is a pet. They're not always domesticated but it still counts. There is always personality variation too. For example, no one would doubt me saying I had a hamster for a pet, even though it would always bite me if I got near it (though that's because it's nocturnal and I could only be around it during the day and it never adjusted to that).
Mauskau 36
So if I have a hostage in my house and feed it, it's automatically my pet? Aw yiss!
wownochillbruh 4
You tried way to hard to be funny
IncognitoPoison 12
I've had pet Crested geckos for about 10 years now and they are some of the coolest and sweetest pets I've ever had.
Abhinow 7
totally agree. reptiles nd big cats r not meant to be pet. the probability of harm from them is highest. they dont share same world view with us. yet some ignorant ppl will go on risking their n other ppls life by having these creatures as pet
slimshadyduhh 4
What the **** are you talking about. Reptiles are great pets you fucktard. You don't know because you never had one.
writerchic85 26
I've had a tegu for 10 years. She was less than a foot long when I got her and she's now 4 feet long. And I've have a turtle for 22 years and a snake since last April. I love them.
confibula 3
I have had lizards for about 4 years. they are amazing pets. in the entire time I have owned them I have only gotten bitten once, and that's only because I was hand feeding her and she bit my finger by mistake.
killer0689 20
you didn't do it on purpose though . well F the lizards life.
rxsey16 16
For people who want to say YDI - would you check in a lawnmower for reptiles before starting it on a normal day? I hope your sister manages well OP
sicksadworld1317 30
I voted YDI. Accidents happen, but the OP is showing quite a bit of disdain for an innocent creature they just obliterated. FYL for the lizard and YDI (the guilt, not the situation) to the OP for being an insensitive asshole.