Today, I found out the real reason why my brother wasn't at his fiancé's Halloween party. He's been in jail for the past 3 months. When was anyone going to tell me? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out via Facebook that my brother got engaged several days ago. Not only did he not tell me, but we live in the same house. FML
Today, I found out that while I was on vacation my neighbor had let my brother into my apartment. I don't have a brother. FML
Today, I found out why my boyfriend won't come over anymore. He and my brother apparently had a "thing" before we started dating. FML
Today, I found out some very disturbing information about one of my brothers, who I have not seen in 8 years. The information is so crazy that I've thought about going to the FBI. FML
Today, I saw my brother on TV after 3 years of no contact. He was being arrested on Cops. FML
Today, I found out my oldest brother is getting married in two weeks. I heard about it through one of my two sisters, who pretty much helped end his last marriage, and who he hasn’t spoken to in 3 years. She wanted to complain about the invite taking so long. I still haven’t been invited, and I thought we were on good terms. FML
Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML
Today, I found out my 35 year-old brother got divorced 18 months ago when my now ex-sister-in-law told me via Facebook messenger, and asked me to tell my parents, as both of them were too scared to do it themselves. FML
Today, I found out that my brother has been stealing money from me for the past five months. FML
Today, my brother mentioned my dad's birthday party. I said, "What party?" He said, "Shit, forgot I wasn't supposed to tell you." My own father doesn't want me at his party. FML
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Top comments
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
wow! now THAT is a hell of a commitment to a Halloween costume. 3 months ago your brother told me that for his fiance's party he was going as a **** up. a standing ovation to you sir. well played. he should definitely win best costume
bethan1 4
Maybe noone told you because they didn't want you to embarrass them by posting it on the internet.
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Comments (65)
smaginn 0
And you didn't even talk to your bro for three months? Sorry, OP YDI
Zomg_Okay 27
And you thought there was nothing wrong with not seeing or hearing from your brother in three months? Wow, I'd hate to be related to you. My whole extended family keeps in touch, despite some living on the other side of the country and others the other side of the world.