Today, I found out that my girlfriend hasn't really been "researching" for work on the Internet; she's actually been tweeting the same pathetic plea to a guy from One Direction asking him to "follow" her. She's 29. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Domestic bliss
Today, I stumbled upon my girlfriend's Twitter account that I didn't know existed. A recent entry states that living with me is pathetic; "it's just that the current economical situation doesn't leave her with many options." FML
Online life
Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML
Today, I was online dating and a girl from high school messaged me. Thinking she might have matured since we're now in our 40's, I messaged back. She then said it was a joke and that I'm still a desperate, pathetic nerd trying to score with the hottest girl in class. FML
Today, my girlfriend got a Twitter account. Now she won't stop hashtagging everything she sends me. FML
Used
Today, I noticed that my girlfriend only texts me when she needs help with her homework. FML
Alexa, play 'Karen Don’t Be Sad' by Miley Cyrus
Today, my girlfriend posted “Alexa, play 'Flowers' by Miley Cyrus” as her Facebook status, all because I didn’t return her 14 missed calls. Apparently, taking an online proctored exam, which required absolute concentration counts as “talking to other women.” FML
Today, it appears that my girlfriend visited an internet web page called "How to confess to having an affair." FML
Sussy baka
Today, out of pure boredom, I created a Twitter account. Looking for pages to follow, I found out that my long-distance boyfriend is actually someone's husband. A month ago he posted a picture of himself and "The love of his life", wishing her a happy 30th birthday. FML
Double life
Today, after a small fight with my girlfriend, I started to miss her, so I typed her name into Google on a whim. Surprisingly, I find a link to a blog in which the owner describes his ongoing effort to seduce my girl. During times she told me she was alone. Thanks babe. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML
Top comments
mpj13 8
I think your relationship is going in the wrong direction.
daniel_0084 14
Sucks OP. it's probably just a phase, she'll get over it. (I Hope) make sure she eventually tries to get a job
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (90)
dreamweeper370 10
That's pretty pathetic so no wonder she lied about it. But hey to each their own I guess.
bball4Life33 11
She needs a job for the both of you, just try to make her get of one direction
mimiminx 23
What?
Afroninja4566 21
What you wrote made no sense
CarrieDiaries 12
It's just a phase. I'm sure shell get over it. :) If not then you need to sit her down and set her a better direction.
DJisHere11 19
"Set her a better direction" What does that mean? Oh, send her in a better direction. Nevermind, I can't comprehend the English language.
mackdeezy 22
Your girlfriend is harassing some geek fresh out of high school to follow her. Its too bad Intervention was cancelled.
4funzies 13
loved that show! :'(
4funzies 13
I bet you're cuter.
TylerAnderson98 10
Maybe she should follow the yellow brick road to the door.
quanito1013 6
You should show her the right direction !
nicoleriela1 9
Try to follow him too? Maybe your chances are better ;)
davincidasecond 24
This is the perfect time to tell her what makes her beautiful.
grumpybr 13
Two words describe this situation: lost cause.