Today, I found out that my daughter has a hit list. There are over thirty names on there. My name is on it as well. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
No way she'll be a Karen
Today, while picking names for our unborn daughter, my mom decided to help by providing a list of names she absolutely won’t accept because they’re all women she hates for insane reasons. It has over 300 common names on it. Every time we pick another name, boom, there it is on her damn list. FML
Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Today, I found out I have a daughter. How did I find out? She added me on Facebook. FML
Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
Today, I realized my daughter has been in longer relationships than I have. FML
Today, it was my daughter's birthday. I didn't know I had a daughter. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML
Top comments
oj101 33
Maybe it's time to rehabilitate your relationship with your daughter? That's pretty disturbing, and wouldn't have had come thoughtlessly to her.
Dramori 29
Give birth to her.
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Comments (135)
Bobby22_fml 5
I don't know what's the most disturbing: The fact that you are her mother and you are on her hit list or the fact that she has a hit list of over 30 names.
darkcosinus 16
Cross one name out with blood and look at her reaction )
ben10jammin 3
Haha that made my day! Thank you!
iHeartMuzik 0
Whats a hit list? ._.
doglover100 29
People they want to kill
omart3 6
wait, do you mean hit as in "i'd hit that" or hit as in "i wanna put a hit on them"?
Gelski58 2
Take her out first
slendamon 0
Send her crazy ass to therapy.
cdelton22 3
Mental hospital
Why_Not31 12
Who doesn't have a hit list?
lululatenight 28
At least she has her priorities in order