Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I found out my stalker is my mom's new boyfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Noname
United States
Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML
nekoneko
United States
Today, I found out my mom pretended to be me and had AIM conversations with my boyfriend. FML
Anonymous
Today, I found out that my crazy stalker got a crazy stalker too. And she's also stalking me. So basically, I'm in some sort of a stalking triangle. FML
Anonymous
Love is love
Today, I found out my dad is dating my dead mom's best friend. FML
PetitPrincePerdu
United States
Today, I found my mother wandering the halls of my fraternity unescorted and asked why she was here, she told me she was concerned when I didn't pick up my phone for two days. She then informed me that she had also moved to the same city I live in. My mother moved over 600 miles to stalk me. FML
wtf dad
Saint Charles, United States
Hey!
Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Fight your own battles
Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML
justdancebbyx3
United States
Today, I logged onto Facebook and found out that my own mother unfriended me because she didn't want her new boyfriend to know that she had a daughter. FML
Jololol
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Anonymous
All in the family
Today, I found out my boyfriend of a year is actually my cousin. Thanks, Mom. FML
Top comments
olivesaur 0
ew
allmidnighteyes 11
So it would appear Edward Cullen likes the older ladies, too...
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Comments (142)
Crimsonhead 0
That's convenient, for him.
aliceharper 0
sounds like a lifetime movie plot lol
romanje 0
lol, good one
LibraLeigh 4
I'm pretty sure this is a movie from Lifetime called Obsessed, ... pretty positive...
allmidnighteyes 11
If you know he's stalking you, then he's doing it wrong. Stalker fail. He should spend the money on a Canon 5D Mk II and get that 800mm f/5.6 to go with it.
squirrels_FTW 3
And you would know this how?
elat4lolz 0
win^
gtrgdss 0
an excellent point - well, the first part anyway. lol
Selena_is_back 7
Run Jessevi, RUN!!!!!
romanje 0
Run Forest Run!!! lol
Selena_is_back 7
NO. It's JESSEVI. }:|
romanje 0
whoa, tell your mom!!!!
pennies_lane 6
Aaaah so this stalker is using your mum to get closer to you. be afraid op, be very afraid......and keep an eye on your undies too. you may find they start to go missing! creepy mc'creepy!
Cinn_fml 23
Are you sure he's stalking you and wasn't stalking your mum? Just a thought. Either way, it's a bit creepy. If you're 100% sure it's you he's stalking (now via your mum), then you might want to bring that up with her, preferably with proof.
Epitome1337 0
says the ugly, stupid bitch
Selena_is_back 7
^^^^ says the one with anime for profile picture.
Epitome1337 0
hey ******, this is good old AMERICAN drawing. next time you see a picture don't just cry out, "omg! japanimation!" okay twinkletoes? besides, I bet you'd fap to this you pathetic loser.
allmidnighteyes 11
Meet Epitome1337, he/she is about to make an ass out of herself with a hypocritical statement on the internet. This fate could have been avoided *if* he/she had a sassy gay friend.
Selena_is_back 7
I wouldn't just use the word "******" whenever I want to or throw it out there like it's bullshit. Nice childish insults by the way. Oh, and get a real picture. Asswipe.
Zmeilerr 22
It could be possible both of them are being stalked.
raymel 5
hehe cinn said mum :3
Cinn_fml 23
Are you grammar nazi-ing me, Raymel? :P
cwark 0
Don't write 'mom'- you're not American..
Cinn_fml 23
Actually it is possible the OP is American and has moved to the UK or something along those lines.
DocBastard 40
Are you seriously criticising what OP calls her mother? If she had said "Marm," would you say anything? How about Mama? Mommy? Mummy? Ma? Mutter? How about if I call you asswipe?
Bullet4MyChemaMo 12
What about 'mam'? Then again, I'm Irish, so.....
cwark 0
just saying that OP is trying to appeal to Americans, I think it's sad really..
Cinn_fml 23
That is only one of many reasons why they might spell it that way, as previously stated.
pinkskye97 0
you sir.... are an idiot.... hate yourself
DocBastard 40
Everyone seems to be throwing this "stalker" term around lately. For your information, looking at someone's Facebook page isn't stalking. Checking you out over meatloaf and green beans isn't stalking. Stalking is climbing up a tree with your best night-vision binoculars and looking through the window at 3AM, just to watch you sleep and to get a good picture of your angelic face as you slumber peacefully, making sure not to break too many branches on the way down and picking up any stray leaves that may have fallen, and erasing the footsteps before you go home and develop the pictures and hang them in my basement shrine to you. Hypothetically speaking.
awesomesauceninj 0
seems like you know a lot about stalking.... hmmmm odd...
iliketurdles 7
As long as its hypothetically speaking, then by all means go, carry on!
TheDrifter 24
What bothers me is that people speak of stalkers in the possessive, like they have some personal claim to them. For some reason phrasing like the Op's always makes me think that the "stalked" person is just a vain, self absorbed attention *****.
CreateZ 0
You forgot to add the part about him licking his lips furiously while he watches you sleep.
squirrels_FTW 3
haha
Crimsonhead 0
Doc... You make me want to touch you. In an inappropriate kind of way.