Today, I found out I'm allergic to my wife's new medicated handcream after I came down with a nasty, itchy rash on my chest, stomach, cock, and balls. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
*recoils in horror*
Today, I am violently allergic to my boyfriend's new hand cream. I know this because after last night's quickie on the sofa, I now have a rash all over my skin and weeping sores inside my vagina and around my bum hole. FML
Rash beard
Today, I was eating out with my partner, and we decided to use the new lube we bought. Things went great until I later realized I was allergic to it and a large red rash spread all across my mouth and chin. It won't go away. FML
Nice spread
Today, I got a new skin cream for my acne. I tested it on a small patch of skin just to make sure I wasn't allergic. I was, and the reaction didn't stay on that small patch of skin. My left arm is now almost entirely covered in a horrible rash. FML
Rip it up and start again
Today, I found out I'm allergic to the pills my doctor prescribed for coughing, which I really need because I ripped a muscle in my stomach. Now my whole upper body is covered in a terrible itchy rash. I also found out it will last for at least another week. FML
No more bukkake for you
Today, I was rushed to the emergency room for severe facial rashes. My boyfriend and I then found out I'm allergic to seminal fluid. FML
Today, I found out the hard way that I'm severely allergic to latex. FML
Today, I found out my ex gave me an STI. Today I also found out I'm allergic to the medication. FML
Hypochondriacs of the world unite!
Today, I was woken up at 2 in the morning by my wife frantically saying something about her having scabies, and that I had to take her to the ER. It turned out to be eczema. FML
Today, I had an allergy test. Not only was I allergic to 35 out of the 40 items, they also found out that I'm allergic to the latex gloves my doctor happened to be wearing. Now my entire back is covered in a rash that will last at least another week. FML
Today, I found out I'm allergic to bug repellent. So instead of having a couple of itchy bug bites, my skin feels like it's on fire and is violently itchy everywhere the repellent has touched. FML
Top comments
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Hey at least your wife touches your balls!
MomentoMori 23
Now you need some medicated cream of your own. Good luck.
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Comments (46)
worldclassrager 41
Time to get allergies tested...hope you can find a solution and a new lotion for your wife to use OP
eamontoplease 6
Doesn't matter, hand sex.
trucker2 33
Matters now
cek727 16
The amount of people who are confused as to why /her/ hand cream caused a rash on /his/ genitals is appalling.
xx000o 27
Those fingers do like to roam.
ChopSuey444 20
The amount of "How did that happen?" comments has lessened my faith in the FML community.
uchihadesendent 14
That sucks getting anything on your **** and balls is bad enough but getting a rash on both at the same time? hope you find something and try some oatmeal and soaking in a bath tub of it it should make the urge to scratch go away for the most part as well as the inflammation.
trucker2 33
Call the Doctor, tell him you'd like something for the rash, the inflammation you'd like to keep.
vikky538 29
Someone had sex last night!!!
Malichy 6
You poor poor man.
A1NoSauce 17
Sounds more like a mouth cream.
sunny354wi 8
If you ever get into an argument with her, you know what to expect now ;)