Today, I finally landed a new job, and thinking he would be proud, I told my boyfriend. Instead of congratulating me, he got mad that my work hours include Saturday, his laundry day. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend keeps mentioning how well his new job pays, while I don’t have any income. He then got upset when I expected him to pay for the groceries I got on my way to his new place. What I bought was stuff I needed so I could cook for him, and for me to eat while I’m there, cleaning and fixing stuff for him. FML
Today, after I helped get my boyfriend get a new job, he thanked me by dumping me for some whore who works there. FML
Today, I got yelled at multiple times by my boss because my boyfriend didn't show up to work. FML
Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML
Today, my boyfriend called work because he is sick. Then he called me four times while I was working, to complain that I was working, and then he got mad when I told him I was sick and worked a double shift two days in a row, because apparently that's "insensitive" of me. FML
Today, I got a sweet promotion at my job. Instead of being happy and celebrating with me, my boyfriend broke up with me because he is jealous that I'm more successful than he is. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that because he works fifty hours a week, I should be meeting an arbitrary quota of fifty hours of housework, and if I don't, I'm insensitive and ungrateful. FML
Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML
Today, after graduating from the same program, I was offered several jobs, while my boyfriend wasn’t. He couldn’t be happy for me, saying, "She got in with the right people, and they just keep handing her jobs," and dismissing my work ethic. FML
Today, during an argument, my boyfriend had the nerve to tell me he'll make more than me at his new job that he starts next week. He can't keep a job for more than six months. I've been working at my job for over two years. FML
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Top comments
Laurenlou 24
Tell him to get off his ass and do the laundry himself! Psh.
FunnyGuy5051 7
mines Sunday
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Comments (165)
FunnyGuy5051 7
mines Sunday
genesisnirvana 11
Saturday is also the day OP is supposed to be in the kitchen.
margie2194 12
Just make him a sandwich. He'll shut up.
aogpi 7
what is this "laundry day" you speak of?
fanceh 10
do I get brownie points for being a guy and doing my own laundry/dishes?
gunmania0 12
My mum does mine.
genesisnirvana 11
17-WTF? I really hope that you're being sarcastic. if not then I feel bad for those around you.
chaoticxxxmess 3
Nope, don't you have a robot that does that for you?
coffeygirl12 14
He needs to change his laundry day...not that hard to figure out.
KiddNYC1O 22
21- The only thing she does to thread is jack it.
tatababe 1
Tell him your not his mother your his gf make him get it right
Jaimegirl 7
He probably wants you to make him a "sammich" on his laundry day too...
X_Codes 11
He needs to do his own laundry.
weewee1 0
He's just saying that. He's really upset because you won't have time to make him sandwiches.
jake1632 9
Can't blame a man for not wanting to do laundry.
leadman1989 16
Yes and his name is Bender. He bends my clothes nice and neat after he washes and dries them. :)
jellitonoctopus 19
If you baby after him, ydi.
ChiFan96 3
Now who will make his sandwiches?
zbajis 7
98- sammiches*
Gourmet_Taco 0
is your boyfriend Dr. Sheldon Cooper?
vickiejiang1990 0
I'd tell him to either change his attitude or he's going to be changed
bandofsand 10
Sure 19, take some points for not being a sexist chauvinist pig. Here's a few more if you haven't mugged a small child lately.
fanceh 10
*insert stereotypical sexist female joke here*
Dark__Angel66 24
Why?
SugarCrazy 14
Because he wants her to do his laundry -_-"
annasworld 3
boys stink
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
34=Lesbian?
soccer1416 0
He is an asshole you should break up with him!!!!
Majstr 23
Nah, he will get used to it.
zinoxity 23
That doesn't necessarily make him an asshole. Just immature.
incrapper 7
he's a guy he shouldnt have to do his laundry thats why women were made
Zero22120 12
# 4 your so right he's upset with her so obviously they need to break up! Seriously people....
WIZchild 0
This doesnt mean she does it for him
WIZchild 0
This doesnt mean she does it for him
LOLbomb 1
"Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I can't do my own laundry." Seriously? This guy is stubborn, but why is it your first instinct to call him an "asshole" and suggest she break up with him? smh There's no such thing as a perfect partner. Get over it.
Jammy01jams 2
So this is why people break up and divorce after a few months into a relationship... People in this generation effing moronic idiots incapable of humour or slight anger/sadness. People deal with your problems.. Jesus I feel like a relationship coach except it's not helping.
22cute 17
Um, look folks, #4 is right. His behavior is dangerously manipulative and controlling He should have been proud of the OP. It's not just about laundry or whatever. She needs to dump him & avoid men like that. So should you all!
Laurenlou 24
Tell him to get off his ass and do the laundry himself! Psh.
xleanne_aLly 23
Exactly, and now that we're making progress OP's boyfriend can make his own sandwiches.
moshipoo 0
WAIT!! If we can make sandwiches, then what are women for?
Isoldael 27
Creating credit card debts for you :D (and yes, I'm a woman, for anyone who thinks I'm being sexist)
thimovw 4
Hahah agreed:p
gunmania0 12
He needs to change his laundry day! How inconvenient OP.
mastersmurf 13
Yup, your job is more important than his laundry. He needs to find a time when you're not working.
every1luvsvag 10
He needs his laundry done, girl.
alphabetsoup96 0
Then he should do it himself, boy.
morticia13 2
Yeah, he's got two hands and legs. He should get his lazy ass off the couch, stop playing black ops and get something done
yadisingh 5
This made me laugh so hard because I took it as a joke. If it's not, then you're an asshole.
shane27 0
I do my laundry sunday night
abcstanley 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
oh no ypur boyfriends mad at youuu fyl.?
sxe_beast 11
Or get a housekeeper :D! Housekeepers FTW.
LOLbomb 1
Why? They're two halves of the same household. Would you rather mow the lawn?
Btreasure 8
Do you do everything for him? If he can't be happy for you then forget him! If a man is old enough for a girlfriend hes old enough to do his own laundry. Seriously how hard is it to do laundry?