Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML
Today, I discovered that when the man living in the house behind me thinks no one in the surrounding area is home, he likes to take his laundry off the line wearing nothing but a pair of sandals. FML
Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML
Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML
Today, my neighbours watched and laughed as I chased my dog around the lawn, trying to rescue the only clean pair of underwear I had in my house. FML
Today, I got up from bed after a good night's sleep, and walked outside. The first thing I saw was my 60-ish year-old neighbor bent over, picking up a newspaper. He was wearing nothing but a way too short bathrobe and a pair of rubber boots. FML
Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML
Today, I found out that my shower area is in direct view from my neighbours' balcony. I realised this when I caught my neighbour and his wife watching me while I was getting dressed. I've been living here for 7 years. FML
Today, I learned that my 76 year-old great aunt likes to swim naked, even when I have friends over. FML
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Top comments
arachnophile 13
There really does seem to be an age where ***** are no longer given. Sorry, OP.
acommonman 23
sorry you had to witness that, but he won't stay for long in this world, let him do as he pleases
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Comments (73)
turtlesman 7
curtains?? lol my neighbor likes to walk shirtless
liquifiednate 21
The OP shouldn't have to always keep curtains covering his windows all day just because of that. That would get depressing after a while, sorry to hear that you saw that OP.
kybon 12
Just because they shouldnt have to doesnt mean its not a reasonable solution that can -at least for the most part- keep everyone happy.
swanheart 35
How about nets? They'll let the light in but keep unpleasant sights at bay...
wvcheesehead 13
No, it was not nets, he was washing his nuts.
maddy20159 6
Call the police and report that disturbance
nonsensical 26
he's naked in his own property. he can be naked if he wants! however OP, I'm sorry you had to see that...
XxDevilxXGt 26
Why are people thumbing him down? It doesn't matter if you're on your own property.. exposing yourself to others is generally illegal no matter where you expose yourself from.
maddy20159 6
Didn't read it right and didn't see that it said elderly..
HairIsEverything 15
Doesn't matter if they're elderly or not. Imagine if OP had kids that were able to see this? Either way the man could get in some serious trouble for indecent exposure. Or OP could just tell him to put some damn clothes on and wash his balls in the shower like normal people. Sprinklers are usually cold as hell anyway I don't know how anyone could enjoy that.
brittaaany_93 38
#38, OP lives in Australia, and it's as hot as Satan's ass crack here at the moment.
riffehunter 16
just inforcing 55s comment just incase no one understands, the seasons are "flipped" in the southern hemisphere, summer is during Europe and North America's winter.
Badabam_fml 14
Where the hell do you live #55. It's freezing here, and I live on the northern end of the Mid North Coast... It's always, like, 24 degrees here.
brittaaany_93 38
#62, on the Queensland coast, it's the humidity that gets me here.
BigJoeZD 16
That really is a horrible thing to see, FYL. However I can't help but feel compelled to try this... I'm worried about how strong the pressure of the water might be though
unidentifieduser 23
He's old, let him do what he pleases.
Paco_el_Taco 17
So what if I were old and enjoyed killing cute cuddly puppies? Would you just let me do as I please?
Roskie 16
Yes, because that's polite.
WitEluded 13
Chris Griffin, is that you?
quicksuper 14
What's wrong with that? Besides, you know, EVERYTHING. Showers are made for a reason.
nonsensical 26
if it's a nice day out why not enjoy an exciting outdoor shower?
ShiiteDisturber 9
I guess wind bathing was just too mainstream
vikky538 29
what you saw..can't be unseen...sorry OP...try curtains...
WildJaw 15
There's no need to go nuts over that.
PenguinBitch 44
Just smile and wave...smile and run!
RedPillSucks 33
do not smile. make no eye contact or he'll think you like it