This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.
Today, I decided to tell my husband our marriage was over after I found out that he'd not only been stealing from me, but he'd also been downloading child porn. He then asked if we could break up but live in the same house so I could help pay his bills. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML
Today, my fiancée woke up from a nightmare where I cheated on her. She has so far successfully gotten into my personal and work e-mails, and all my social media. I'm not sure if I'm worse at picking a wife or at picking passwords. FML
Today, I got a call from a girl I dated long ago, who cheated on me and got pregnant by another guy, or so we thought. Turns out it isn't his, and she is taking me to court for child support. FML
Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML
Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
Today, I turned off my boyfriend's Xbox while he was playing because I wanted to talk to him about getting more serious with our relationship. As I did so, he said, "That's not the only thing you just turned off" and promptly broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
meirasanya 10
Report him to the police! Stealing from you is illegal enough, but downloading child **** as well! He won't need to worry about bills from jail. It's also safer for children if he's locked away.
ihateexams 0
Anonymously call the police and report him for downloading child pornography. If there's any evidence on his computer, that will probably be enough to prosecute.
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Comments (129)
ridiculous_gnome 0
Hey, you really should report him to the authorities... otherwise you could be framed as an acomplice or at least charged for being lenient to a federal criminal...
drimpossible 0
"charged for being lenient to a federal criminal" Is this an actual offence?
Hexefrau 5
The charge would actually fall under the category of "aiding and abetting". And I agree. Report him, so you don't take the fall, OP. Especially if you have kids living in the house. And child **** is child ****...if you, as a legal adult, are viewing pornography willingly and knowingly that has underage persons in it, it is child ****, plain and simple. Child **** is one of the rare "black and white" scenarios in the criminal justice system. It doesn't matter if the subject in the porno flick is 6 or 16; illegal is illegal. To be fair, however, that's different than viewing the flicks that have the fake teens in them...and there is a ton of those, so be sure you know what you're reporting before you potentially **** up someone's life.
lotusflower007 0
I think that if the police were to investiage, they would know the difference between the real CP, and the 18 year old ****.
Hexefrau 5
I wasn't implying that the police wouldn't know; rather I was implying that OP should not be hysterical and ensure she knows what she is seeing before potentially ruining someone's life.
untoldfame 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
you said yes, right?
emokat666 0
ewe girl kick his ass out! it's ur house do it
Lenicka 0
I do hope you told him to forget about it and kicked him out. Also, if he really is downloading child porno ( and no so called teens you often get in **** movies ), let the cops know. This is no fun. And choose your spouses better next time.
BlueTwist89 0
LOL. Fyl cuz moochers suck.
temescal 0
How does your husband "steal" from you. You're married. It's his too. But if you aren't exaggerating the child in the child ****, that part sucks.
Lenicka 0
What ? So if you are married your things are no longer yours ? So do you think it would be ok for me to go into my husband purse and take all the money cos they are mine too anyway ?? I am glad I am not married to you.
Boddmon 0
I'd like to know why your husband carries a purse.
Kukironosuke 16
i agree with bodmon why does he have a purse? and when your married you do techniqly own everything your spouse owns, there is no legal theft in marriage, but still in a respectful marriage each person tells discusses with their partner what they are going to spend money on(if its important and not just like a 5$ item), so he shoulda asked to have/use whatever item of his wifes he stole, but techniqly he didnt steal anything cuz whatever his wife owns is his and vice versa, its just the moral question and about the cp, if its just young looking 18-19 year olds which look very much like jail bait, its not that big of a deal, but if it definatly cp(obviously 17- kids) then you should call the cops
daengh 15
Only where "community property" is the law. That isn't everywhere.
Tomaino 3
Property is property. It may not be money. Maybe he took a piece of jewelry and pawned it, maybe he took heirlooms, gifts that were given to her. Assets are shared in a marriage, yes, but if he did something like that it is stealing and it is wrong.
sharon_ellj 0
Well, your husband a pedophile... Eww... Why the heck did you even marry him anyway?
catriona_cd 0
they hide it well so most would never know what they are :(
escualida 0
Did you report him to the police? I hope to god that you did!
YoungE 0
a purse?...where does it say that?...anyway If you have kids, take them and move as far as you can away from him
Boddmon 0
I was replying to #19 about the purse..
bartmasta 0
stop bashing on her husband because he looks at CP
ridiculous_gnome 0
Are you being sarcastic?
italian_babe 0
#25 you have ******* problems. go get help
Twi_lover_EC 6
#25 WTF? you sick ****! Child **** is...Ugh...children! What do u **** children?????
cms_family 0
you need to turn your husband in to the police so they can put him in jail and then they can find the site he was on and trace it to the pervs that run that site and any that has any intrest in children sexually should die a horrible death. then brought back to life and killed in a new horrible and repeat so they can experience some of the pain they put the children through.