This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.
Today, I decided to tell my husband our marriage was over after I found out that he'd not only been stealing from me, but he'd also been downloading child porn. He then asked if we could break up but live in the same house so I could help pay his bills. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML
Today, my fiancée woke up from a nightmare where I cheated on her. She has so far successfully gotten into my personal and work e-mails, and all my social media. I'm not sure if I'm worse at picking a wife or at picking passwords. FML
Today, I got a call from a girl I dated long ago, who cheated on me and got pregnant by another guy, or so we thought. Turns out it isn't his, and she is taking me to court for child support. FML
Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML
Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
Today, I turned off my boyfriend's Xbox while he was playing because I wanted to talk to him about getting more serious with our relationship. As I did so, he said, "That's not the only thing you just turned off" and promptly broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
meirasanya 10
Report him to the police! Stealing from you is illegal enough, but downloading child **** as well! He won't need to worry about bills from jail. It's also safer for children if he's locked away.
ihateexams 0
Anonymously call the police and report him for downloading child pornography. If there's any evidence on his computer, that will probably be enough to prosecute.
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Comments (129)
Cristaderzi 0
Yep this idiot needs to be in Gen Pop With guards who are salty old dogs!!! Children and animals are the one thing You dont hurt!!!
me5 0
No wonder he watches child ****. He IS a child!
hedgehogs 0
Yeah, you should see these creeps in court. Snigger. They all somehow look like giant, pathetic wusses sitting next to their lawyer, even when they're out of prison garb.
Anteezy 7
Even if the **** he was looking at was borderline 18 or not, it's still not right for him to look at it because the boys/girls are still way younger than him, so he most likely has some serious issues. I wonder though if a 16 year old guy has a naked picture of his 16 year old girlfriend on his computer is he breaking the law?
Redjourney88 0
tell him prison will take care of all his living expenses ;)
squonky44 0
I know that in the UK (where the age of consent in 16) if a guy of any age has a picture of anyone under the age of 16 naked or whatever, he is breaking the law. So if a 16 year old guy has a picture of his 15 year oldgirlfriend in her underwear, he can be prosecuted.
monster_tamer 11
The age of consent in the UK is 16? I keep getting confused on FML... I'm hearing 17/18 for the USA, but 16 if both parties are the same age... And 16 for the UK, but there are still discrepancies... Can anyone clear this up for me please? ^^'
intensitive 11
Google is your friend.
j_waldo51 0
That is messsed up their is a special word for him its called fe fe witch means prison B****
FML09FML 0
OP, besides it being the morally right thing to do by reporting it, depending on where you live, you could actually get in trouble yourself for not reporting it. Then you would be posting an ammendment to this post when you get arrested for failing to report a crime against a child. FYL if you don't report this!
xXStarlightXx 0
I say through that **** nag out of your house keep all his shit and report that dirty asshole to the police for being a sick ****
thisismitch 3
eww
dearadelaide 0
I'd have told him no, thrown him the hell our of my house, and reported authorities for his possession of child ****. And while waiting for cops or whatever, I would have found a way to tell him how the hell he got CP in the first place, and report the ******* there, too. Visiting FML would not have been at the top of my priority list.