Today, I walked into my best friend's house and her mom threw a box of condoms at me and said, "Stay safe, slut." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom barged into my room, threw 5 boxes of condoms at me, then said, "So you don't get pregnant". She still hasn't accepted the fact that I'm a lesbian. FML
Today, my Mom found out that I've been intimate with one of my best friends in the past. We used protection, it never went anywhere, and we ended it amicably, but she still gave me a huge lecture. Later, she high-fived and congratulated him. FML
Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. His mom didn’t know much about it, and she walked in on us. After about 5 minutes she came back up, threw a box of condoms at us, says, "Continue" and walked out. We were still fucking while she was in the room. FML
Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML
Today, whilst celebrating my birthday with my friends and family, I met a girl at the bar who seemed interested. She became very disinterested and left after my mother whispered in her ear "If you go home with my son make sure he wears a condom." FML
Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said, "You know you can't wash and reuse these?" FML
Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML
Today, my mum cleaned my room. When I got home she yelled at me for having condoms. I'm 24 years old and in a long term relationship. FML
Today, my mom was snooping around my room, and found the unopened box of glow in the dark condoms I bought myself year ago. She laughed and said, "No takers yet, eh?" FML
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Top comments
Inkoseh 33
#thathappened
RichardPencil 32
Some people show love in a weird way.
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Comments (8)
Inkoseh 33
#thathappened
BurnInDemonFire 39
Coming up this week on "It's Always Sunny...", Mac reveals a past childhood trauma, Dennis doesn't use the story to bed 50 women, and Charlie doesn't sniff glue while eating cat food. Don't forget to tune in to also find out why no one calls Dee "Bird" and Frank doesn't pull a gun. All on this week's episode titled "Shit that didn't happen, but we tried to make a story out of it, anyway."
RichardPencil 32
Some people show love in a weird way.
DonULFonso 22
"Speaking with authority, aren't you?"
RatInc. 7
Bad b*tch vibes
Jonkbaby 23
im very sorry. maybe shes going through menopause. which doesnt excuse her actions, but thats my guess