Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my mom barged into my room, threw 5 boxes of condoms at me, then said, "So you don't get pregnant". She still hasn't accepted the fact that I'm a lesbian. FML
Today, my mom called me into the living room to say that she had something important to tell me. She then explained how she and my dad had "talked things over" and wanted me to know that they accept me and love me no matter what. Apparently my mom thinks I'm lesbian. I'm not. FML
Cold reading bullshit merchant
Today, my mom went to a psychic. The reason? She has convinced herself that I'm gay, even though I've told her that I'm not, and never have been. The psychic disagreed. Apparently, I'm bi-curious with one of my guy friends. Guess who my mom believes? FML
Denial
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, after being out of the closet for over three years, I learned that some of my friends still don't believe me that I am really a lesbian. They still think I made the whole thing up because I can't get a man. FML
Keeping up
Today, I found out that my mother has been telling everybody that I’m a lesbian, because both of her best friends have at least one gay child each, and she was feeling left out. This explains why people have been treating me differently the last few weeks. FML
Today, I learned that despite having told them two years ago, my parents still aren't accepting of me being gay. I found this out when my mom called and asked if I was "cured" yet. FML
Follow the lifescript
Today, I came out to my parents as lesbian. Surprisingly, they were OK with it… just as long as I still marry a dude, give them grandbabies, and keep the whole lesbian thing a deep, dark, shameful secret that we never talk about again. FML
Top comments
KBeatz 5
Well, at least you didn't get your logic from her. Clearly, you are the smarter lass.
officeradvil 8
I'm sorry, but your mother is an idiot. Or she is in denial. Either one will work.
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Comments (211)
carminecris89 13
Is your mom a blonde?
KiddNYC1O 22
What?
Bigmoneyshotz 0
Simple solution to that make a sex tape and play it for her at Christmas dinner.
1crabbygirl 10
Da Nile: ain't just a river in Egypt.
Alexion_Danger 0
If she doesn't want to believe you then find a girlfriend and tell her again
That_Korean_Kid 4
is that how it works?
DylansMomma 9
Your comment : How can people be so ignorant? Does she really believe that's how it works? I feel sorry for you.
DylansMomma 9
Your comment : #132 - Who's to says what is "right" and what is "wrong?" There isn't a "right" way or "wrong" way to live a life. As long as said person is happy - then so be it. This is the 21st century. Get with it.
CRC_101 31
So if a person is happy living life as a serial killer, is that acceptable in society? If we live by your philosophy, chaos will ensue quickly. It sounds happy and good for everybody in theory, but in reality, it certainly is not. If there were not other people in the world saying your idea isn't always correct, I can gurantee you wouldn't be alive to see the 21st century.
AwsumShyGuy 12
At least you didn't break your arm and came out with anesthetics.
Goodlife918975 6
I'm not trying to be mean but I think that being gay or a lesbian is just stupid and if I have kids and they turn gay out the door they go.
cjrand 7
Maybe it skips a generation... Apparently pike being a moron in your family (your mom, not you)