Today, I came home after a two week vacation to find that my wonderful dog had pooped and peed all over my room. My mother was kind enough to dog-sit; however, instead of helping me by cleaning up the horrid mess, she just left me coupons for Glade plug-in air fresheners. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home from my vacation. My sister had been taking care of my dog and my apartment while I was away. As I walked in, I was greeted by a floor covered in poop and a destroyed couch. FML
Today, after coming home from a two week vacation, my dog was pink, there were beer bottles and used condoms on my bed, and everything was a mess. I asked my sister, who'd been watching over the place, what had happened. She just said, "Oops." and hung up. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, I left my dog alone in the house for ten minutes while I took a shower. When I got out I found a mess of dust all over the floor and her ripping up a package that was supposed to be sent to my aunt. It contained my grandmother's ashes. FML
Today, my dog apparently vomited straight down a heating vent while I was out. The stench was so bad that when I got home and the smell hit me, I threw up too. Looks like I'll be spending a few days with my mother as the house airs out. FML
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
Today, I went to the local pet store to purchase a large dog bed so my dog wouldn't sleep in mine. After I got home and set up her bed, I realized I forgot to buy dog treats. When I came home again, her new bed was torn to shreds, and she was still sleeping on my bed. FML
Today, I came home to find that my mother had cleaned my room, and she'd done a very good job, too. So good in fact, that she even managed to remove all of the furniture, replacing it with a note that said, "It's time to go, sweetie XO". FML
Today, I came home from a two-week vacation. When I walked into my house, I found cat poop everywhere. It took me several hours to clean it all up, and the house still smells terrible. The worst part is that I've never owned a cat in my life. FML
Today, I came home after working overtime to find my dog whining and giving me her "I need to take a shit" face. After changing my shoes, I came back ready to let her out, only to find her giving me the "I just took a shit on your rug" face. My husband has been home all day. FML
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Top comments
muffinsareyummy 1
i hope she didn't charge you for the coupons.
ppl2ppl 4
OP was on a 2 week vacation you dumb twat, how is she suppose to clean up after her dog when she is away?
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Comments (44)
MK1029 0
beritis 0
wow, now that's a nice mother.... FYL first...
MK1029 0
First? I THINK NOT! MUWHAAHAHHA
rakhil11 7
you didn't say anything in your first comment though, so it doesn't count!
beritis 0
i mean it, she does have nice mother... leaving some coupons, and leaving...
FML_FYL_88 0
what a bitch! that sucks
lostfaithinpppl 19
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
It's your dog. Why should anybody help you clean up its mess??? YDI as far as I am concerned
ppl2ppl 4
OP was on a 2 week vacation you dumb twat, how is she suppose to clean up after her dog when she is away?
Tequilamockngbrd 7
Well, I guess now all of the dog-lovers from the cat-peeing-on-the-stove FML can't really talk now.
Skull_300 0
Beat the **** out of that Bitch....your mother!!!
perdix 31
You've got a dogshit mom. YDI for hiring an incompetent for the job. You should have gotten a professional pet-sitter or taken your dog to a kennel. How has your mom been able to withstand the smell? Maybe after a lifetime with you, the scents of decaying and decomposing dog urine and feces are not that bad.
allmidnighteyes 11
plug it in, plug it in :]
Dazzozo 0
What are mothers for!
Skull_300 0
You sure it wasn't your mother that pissed and shit in your room? Maybe she is framing your dog. Bitch!!!
Jewelofagal 2
Your Mom can't help that you haven't housebroken your dog. It's too much for you to expect her to give you two weeks of her time but to also clean up feces and urine.