Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Creepy
Today, my roommate informed me that one of her scorpions is loose in our apartment again. Great. FML
Pincushion
Today, I accidentally broke a vase. When I was clearing it up, I used my bare hand to sweep up the shards without thinking. I'm still fishing pieces of broken glass out of my hand. FML
Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML
Psssssych!
Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML
Winds of change
Today, I stepped on a glue trap for scorpions. Bare foot. There was a scorpion already caught on it. It wasn't dead. FML
Slasher
Today, I made some burritos when a photo frame fell and smashed over my pan. I'm pretty broke so I thought I got all the glass out of the meat and ate some. I reheated the meat for dinner too and well, I found the glass that time... FML
I'm outta here
Today, my boyfriend's recently mated tarantula disappeared from her enclosure with her egg sac, so she's now somewhere in the house with between 20 and 100 babies hatching within a week. I moved out this afternoon. My boyfriend caused this, he can damn well find her before I set foot in there again. FML
Today, I woke up in my living room after having a party. I then realized my fish tank with many different species was missing from its usual spot. After searching for a few minutes, I finally found it in the freezer. FML
Today, I got rear-ended on my way home from the pet store, causing my pet food to open up and go flying all over the floor of my car. My pet is a snake, and his food is live mice. FML
Spider-man
Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML
Top comments
colton_colton 50
You will once you sit down
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I wouldn't be able to sleep... I hope you can find them. Look in quiet dark places and don't stick your hands anywhere you can't see!
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Comments (133)
Mooglefox 24
Get a UV light. They glow under those lights
lovexsarah 12
Exactly why you shouldn't keep scorpions as pets...
CaptainRR 20
I can help. Alright. Scorpions prefer cooler areas. Depending on the type of your "cute and cuddly" pets, they'll be hiding in different places. Look for them under places. IE) under the bed, under the refrigerator. Try to lure your scorpions out with food. Have fun sleeping
fsomelife 26
****. I live in California.
Nyx7 24
and you're sitting around telling us about it? o.o find those little ***** before you wake to them sitting on you while you sleep!
Neopopulas 9
This is why you should never have a pet you aren't comfortable being in the same bed with.
NaturalBornChaos 9
That is exactly why I won't keep anything that I'm not comfortable getting out of its enclosure, I'll keep fish, snakes, turtles, frogs, salamanders, and dogs, but Arachnids and insects are definitely out of the question, not to mention the possibly of needing medical attention after a not so great encounter.
racerx246 6
Why do you have pet scorpions in the first place???
WarriorOmen 25
Same reason people have pet spiders, snakes, birds, crabs, and other strange creatures. Anything can be a pet to some people. Hell some even have pet monkeys.
thejonac 21
try attracting them with some food ?
Kejus 13
At least now you will know for sure what is crawling around at night, while you sleep. Hahah.