Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML
Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML
Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML
Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML
Today, after waiting well over a month for a work visa in Germany that should only have taken 3 weeks to come through, I finally received my long-awaited answer. Unfortunately, that answer was "We lost your paperwork." FML
Today, my mom booked a family trip to Sweden. This would be great, if she hadn't asked me to tell our former German exchange student that we were coming to visit her in Germany. She was thrilled. Now I have to be the one to let her down. FML
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Top comments
BingleBop 18
Well at least you should be pretty good at German by the end if your stay. You always learn faster when you're forced to!
CammyGal 26
Why would you choose to go to Germany if you didn't know the language? You couldn't have expected the family to do everything for you. If you were forced to go, you still should have known beforehand and made an effort to learn.
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Comments (135)
anony1237 0
55 I agree op is a total moron
izlone 11
how could they have told u that they speak English if they don't speak English?
Steffi 26
OP said they don't speak fluent English, which means they may speak enough to say that.
kt520 7
It may also be because OP is in a program, and the family's information in the program was in correct
GregoryStalver_fml 6
Why the **** did you go to Germany for all summer if you don't speak German ?
thew_fml 14
many germans speak english, so not to worry. this is the best way to learn a language
picturescrazy 24
You're going to be in Germany all summer long and you didn't bother to learn at least the basics of the language? How are you supposed to enjoy the culture?? YDI
davek 36
Surely learning the language is one of the main reasons for going?
PenguinForDinner 16
Aw, I'm sorry this happened to you. It happened to me once, with a french family. And they were so secluded too. It was a horrible stay! Hope you get to meet other people there, and get out a bit. And that you pick up on German fast!
jlg337 11
I don't think this is an fml at all! I would love to stay with Germans that don't speak English.
Denizzje 5
And what keeps you from learning German? O_o
xAkonz 10
How would they tell you they spoke fluent English if they only spoke German?