Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML
Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML
Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML
Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML
Today, after waiting well over a month for a work visa in Germany that should only have taken 3 weeks to come through, I finally received my long-awaited answer. Unfortunately, that answer was "We lost your paperwork." FML
Today, my mom booked a family trip to Sweden. This would be great, if she hadn't asked me to tell our former German exchange student that we were coming to visit her in Germany. She was thrilled. Now I have to be the one to let her down. FML
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Top comments
BingleBop 18
Well at least you should be pretty good at German by the end if your stay. You always learn faster when you're forced to!
CammyGal 26
Why would you choose to go to Germany if you didn't know the language? You couldn't have expected the family to do everything for you. If you were forced to go, you still should have known beforehand and made an effort to learn.
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Comments (135)
jackiemora 18
Are you sure it was the family that told you they speak English or some troll translator?
TheJester12 15
God forbid you * attempt * to learn the native language of the country that you are staying in. Think of this as a learning opportunity ! :)
DriAA7 17
I was an exchange student to Brasil a few years ago. Immersion is honestly the best way to learn a foreign language. You'll be fine. Your language learning skills will pick up. I learned about two phrases before i left but came back pretty fluent.
raphanne_fml 33
You can always come to visit me in Strasbourg, which is right next to Germany, if you like. I speak English and I can show you the city.
cieloalicia 16
Rosetta stone is your best friend.
circuitboynm 8
If I were spending the summer in Germany I probably would have learned some German. I'd get Rosetta Stone if I was you!
monnanon 14
what on earth are you doing on an exchange if you do not speak any of the language? thr exchange family should be english if they are taking on a kid from an english country but you should at least know the pleasentries in German.
AngrySailor 17
Isn't that sort of the point though. OP will learn with a little effort won't take long to get by
monnanon 14
to go there knowing nothing is not the point of an exchange. you do them to build on your knowledge of the language, dialects, the people and the country. exchanges are often set up by languages classes making the fact op knows no german even worse.
monnanon 14
i meant the family should speak english not be english. that kind of defeats the purpose of an exchange otherwise :)
VeganVampyre 27
I agree, 26! You should learn a few basic phrases any time you travel, but especially if you're going to be living there for 2 months! I also don't understand why OP would go on exchange to a place they apparently have no interest in? :/ OP- "ja"- yes, "nein"- no, "bitte"- please, "bitte schön- you're welcome", "danke (schön)"- thank you (very much), "wie geht es ihnen?"- how are you doing?, and the ever important "sprechen sie auch anglisch?"- do you speak any English? are your new best friends!
JasonUMN 15
Now you will have more time to focus on your Hausaufgaben.
american_desi 2
If they don't understand English and you don't speak German, How did you even ask them "if they spoke English?"
random_commenter 9
Don't worry, for basic communication purposes German and English are similar enough not to cause you too many problems. And maybe you can visit a language course? This is usually a pretty good way to meet interesting people!
laurenasabutton 26
If basic communication extends as far as "Hallo", then sure. Any further and the languages are not similar enough to be mutually intelligible.
7Diamond 12
Bier and beer sounds similar enough. I don't see a problem.
laurenasabutton 26
Sure, if beer is a necessity for your basic communication :p.