Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML
Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML
Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML
Today, I have learned a lot of "big" words from reading so much, but can actually only pronounce about half of them correctly. FML
Today, I went to the hairdresser for the first time in the country I just moved to. Guess I don't speak the language as well as I thought. FML
Today, I was reading a book in German, which I don't know very well. Suddenly I reached a passage I had no trouble understanding. Excited, I showed my husband, saying I was finally getting the hang of it. He laughed and patted my head. Turns out, that particular passage was a quote. In English. FML
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Top comments
mliajkfml 15
Maybe only ever visit a small area of Germany?
cornwallus24 8
Germans will help you.They probably know better English than you.
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Comments (54)
mliajkfml 15
Maybe only ever visit a small area of Germany?
cornwallus24 8
Germans will help you.They probably know better English than you.
thatonechicksaid 12
that's true and not true. in Germany, you're forced to learn English from first grade til you graduate. i know from experience
randomname98 22
Well I'm visiting Germany right now, and it seems everyone on the streets can speak English. They are more than willing to help (for the most part). Usually they just start speaking English when they hear your accent
AlmostDiffident 9
Was it Low German? Never learn Low German. Only learn standard German if you want to visit Germany.
vampire9545 5
hochdeutsch ftw!
toolazytotype99 18
At least you'll be fluent in some of Germany till you learn the rest. Good luck OP
4FukSake 12
I will get you started. Nein=no
ericanicole1 12
Also acht (sounds like oct) means 8 as in octagon ?
KebabRemover 6
Ja
Cyrus00 41
I'm half german and can speak the language fluently, but when I visit an area of Germany which I'm not from I cannot understand a word they are saying. Everywhere has different dialects so its very difficult.
Mauskau 36
We have the same in the UK, it's difficult to understand people from some parts due to their accents and weird sayings.
elainebarish 8
I have the same issue in Canada! A lot of people from southern Ontario sound nearly american, but Newfies have such a bizarre way of speaking that I'd actually have an easier time talking to somebody from Quebec!
Im_Sleepy_Gamer 12
Really I'm also from Canada I'll have to talk to one
Mynamewontfi 40
Same in The Netherlands. Even though it's a small country, there're many different dialects. One province even has very its own language, which is only spoken there so no other Dutchman understands them.
vampire9545 5
we have a lesser issue in America. we have many accents but only boston is terrible. p.s. Pennsylvania Dutch ftw
GamerG0DDESS 29
Pretty sure I can't understand my own town with all these valley girl hashtag java latte with no whip yoga boot people in my town. America is definitly the worst out of them all. (hope you've picked up on the joke).
Dilexar 26
Well, you can either just settle in that small part of Germany, or you can choose to work a bit harder and have a German tutor or friend teach you standard German. Either way, good luck, and FYL
aGMAELSTR0M 10
Hey, if you were willing to learn a new language, then you're already on the right path. Nothing wrong with furthering your education. Keep up the good work!
RosaMaravillosa 10
I agree.
KillerChipmunk 15
German dialects and accents can get ridiculous. I had two different teachers, so my accent is super weird. One of my friends said it sounds like a country girl who married up.
fitnessgram 19
Just say the word "beer" that's all you need to get a Germans attention.
Dilexar 26
I thought this was hilarious. reminded me of the movie Beerfest
19foxy81 8
Great movie by the way :)