Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML
Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML
Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML
Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML
Today, after waiting well over a month for a work visa in Germany that should only have taken 3 weeks to come through, I finally received my long-awaited answer. Unfortunately, that answer was "We lost your paperwork." FML
Today, my mom booked a family trip to Sweden. This would be great, if she hadn't asked me to tell our former German exchange student that we were coming to visit her in Germany. She was thrilled. Now I have to be the one to let her down. FML
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Top comments
BingleBop 18
Well at least you should be pretty good at German by the end if your stay. You always learn faster when you're forced to!
CammyGal 26
Why would you choose to go to Germany if you didn't know the language? You couldn't have expected the family to do everything for you. If you were forced to go, you still should have known beforehand and made an effort to learn.
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Comments (135)
BronzeShoe 11
Should've learned German before you went to Germany for more than a week stay.
Kenpokid4 2
Here's a legitimate suggestion - use an online translator.
rockydify 22
Start learning. Babies aren't born knowing their mother tongue - this will be a great experience for you if you're open to it.
randm_dude 9
lol. Fortunately 90% of the Germans actually speak English to some extent. You want to learn some German. Local university, department for English. Find the the studets board, post an ad you are looking for a "Tandem Partner" to teach you German and you teach her/him English in exchange. I just hope OP did not end up in some village. xd Sink or swim or immersion as it is called, can be somewhat frustrating, if you have no clue at all.
ichoosetobe 10
So learn German. I did that with Japanese, you'll learn so much faster!
soccerbeast2016 2
You should have learned German in the first place if you're going to Germany
PRItalian 4
Is called; google translate
jrliandro 9
Where and how long are you staying? I'm from Houston and live in Munich now.
MrPortalFan 21
2 words: google translate.
Chelse1403 18
Google translate doesn't always give the right answer.
Chelse1403 18
Go on your phone and see how to say "what is this?" In German. They will then answer in their language and you (by choice) can tell them what it is in English. That is how my German teacher learned and that is how I'm learning. I'll point to things like a desk or door. Just simple things. She then answers in German. It's actually easy.