Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which I get shot at with paintballs for six hours. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
Today, the police came to my house and arrested me. Why? The neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to hide behind my house and shoot at people with paintball guns. People saw it coming from my house and called the police. I was fired from work, due to missing it without notice. No excuses. FML
Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML
Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
Today, I went paint-balling with my girlfriend. As we drove she was scared about getting shot a lot, especially in the head. I reassured her that with all the protective gear it was unlikely. First round, within a minute, she gets shot 3 times in the back of the head. FML
Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML
Today, I went to my new job at a pre-school. I was really excited because everything was going so well, and a little boy even said he was drawing a picture of me. He even gave it to me when he was finished. Well it was me, but I was also on fire and being stabbed and shot multiple times. FML
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
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Top comments
Micayla 12
Hey, it'll be some type of experience to put down on your resume! Props to you though, I got hit with a paintball once and it hurt like hell!
purebliss_fml 19
A job's a job! At least you're not a hooker, if that makes you feel any better...
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Comments (143)
Soninuva 41
I want to know what place this is! Are you a living target at some kind of paintball range?
Brutaldollie 3
in seaside by me they have this. they just run around and you shoot them.
Soninuva 41
Ah, I always forget how masochistic you are, perdix!
bobak_can_ani 7
Chin up. At least you maintained your pride and didn't beg or prostitute. You'll get a better job soon.
RedPillSucks 33
Chin up gets you a paintball in the throat.
eddeeezzyy 19
This reminds me of this one picture I saw in which this guy held up a sign that said: Kick me in the balls for $20
mustabee 5
hahahahahahahahahhahahahhaha, im sorry, anyway hope you dont have small balls, aparently, the smaller they are, the more painfull (Agax, 2013). Anyway, we got to do what we gota do, make the best out of it
drewflav 17
I'd rather get shot at with paintballs than have a soccerball kicked at my crotch. I suspect most guys here would agree.
isallwaysme 27
i dont know. a paintball to the crotch is more painful. i should know (i play and ref speedball)
Maui303 1
Do you work at a corn maze and get shot at by zombie hunters on a school bus?
Bcfrmkc816 17
Sounds like some fun
kumarina 35
Hey is ok, you are trying for an honest way, cheers!!
CrissyyyS2 22
You should offer the idea to make it more challenging and start dodging them (: