Today, at archery practice, I jokingly said that I'd kiss the next person to get a bullseye. They all made a point of missing their targets, some even shooting their arrows way off to the side. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the officers of my archery club forgot to check if anybody was behind the targets looking for arrows. I got hit in the leg. FML
Today, while talking to a friend, I momentarily forgot the word for archery and instead called it, “Bow-and-Arrow Jutsu.” FML
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I was laughing at a girl who really sucks at badminton. Turns out she has anger issues, and a really good aim when she's mad. I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before. FML
Today, my parents got mad at me because I laughed when they called the bullseye "bonsai" while watching darts. They've always thought it was bonsai. FML
Today, my fencing team took pictures for the yearbook. We were having individual pictures with our weapons, and it was my turn. When the photographer told me to pose, I tried to be super cool by quickly putting my sabre against my chest like some sort of soldier. I poked myself in the eye. FML
Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to take an airhorn to a golf course and blow it while people were teeing off. It was very funny, until I blew the horn during some guy's backswing and his ball was shanked in my direction and hit me in the head. FML
Today, I was playing with my yo-yo. I began showing off to my friends. When the girl I liked walked by, I thought it'd be really cool to do the move "dog bite". I ended hitting myself in the balls. Hard. FML
Today, I was at a shooting range with my father. The target was a creepy poster of a man. My father said, "This one is for your boyfriend." Perfect groin shot. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You could play Katniss Everdeen if they ever make a movie out of "The Ugly Games."
Screwie 25
"Just kidding, the rules were that I'd kiss whoever missed! Now let's get intimate
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Comments (72)
perdix 31
You could play Katniss Everdeen if they ever make a movie out of "The Ugly Games."
SnowWitney 17
Don't worry OP. They all missed because they were so nervous at the idea of kissing such a beautiful young lady such as yourself. At least that what your mother will tell you, assuming she's not a A-hole like those archery guys.
unknown_user5566 27
1- After reading your comment, I pictured Peeta and Katniss at the end of the games, when they decided to try and **** with the rules. Only in "The Ugly Games", I'd imagine Peeta would just eat the poisonous berries.
Marrach 7
14- Don't lie. You do not want to boost someones self esteem just to go back down. I'm sure shes not the ugliest person. Either way, everyone has beauty one way or another.
ohSNAPyall 27
15 TMI
airforce987 20
"The Ugly Games" ...Sounds like a porno...a bad...bad..."what has been seen cannot be unseen" porno.
oj101 33
I was going to kiss someone, but then I took an arrow to the knee...
Drigr 9
15 ruined the movie for me...
annie_nk 23
30 - In the book, they actually put the berries in their mouths but spit em out in time. Go see the movie. It's been out for months now
Drigr 9
I was being sarcastic. Though I never read the books, I did see the movie twice in theatres and bought it on blu ray the day it was released. I plan on reading the rest before the movies come out though. AFTER I finish the Sword of Truth series.
arrowintheknee 5
28 i know how you feel...
alisidewinder 9
33-sword of truth is amazing. 1- "the ugly games" I would totally watch. However I'm sure op is a beautiful young woman. :)
hellproof023 6
Getting a little off subject but the sword of truth series is the best story EVER period.
MeLuvBewbs 7
Awwwww! Someone out there will do anything for your kiss! Just wait!
preps87 0
Not make a bulls-eye, apparently.
ohSNAPyall 27
Including giving OP a Klondike bar?
horseridermc 2
The least they could've done was pretended they cared...
Screwie 25
"Just kidding, the rules were that I'd kiss whoever missed! Now let's get intimate
Screwie 25
Oh whoa, the comment got cut: " TROLL THEM OP, TROLL THEM.
SarahBabieex3 4
Hahaha best comment everr!!
8KAGE8 8
Ermahgerd I know this has nothing to do with the FML but I love your profile picture! Renaaaa!
alexlovescandy 3
Damn. That sucks, some people are just terrible.
UncleMuscles 5
No, she is a hussy, next thing you know, she be just passing out handshakes too!
olpally 33
Sounds like the scene from "10 things I hate about you" guy distracts girl, she shoots the coach in the ass with an arrow... Lol... People are such jerks, jeez.
CharresBarkrey 16
This is nothing like that scene.
astoryofroses 9
"that's alright, no one likes kissing assholes anyway"
maronofhearts 19
Who are you quoting? Yourself? Or is that one of napoleons famous quotes (Yeah yeah I get it that's what op should/could have said)
Insanemf18 12
That's not what you say to your boy friend
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Let's hope no one gets an arrow in the kne--*shot*
enchi999 8
No... Just no
pokefan813 16
*reloads* I'm sorry, chipmunk I just had to.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Yes, 35, to finish poor Chipmink off.
arrowintheknee 5
Im sorry he wont ever be an adventurer again.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
There's three extra people on my death list.
MagicGiraffe 12
I used to be a Vault Hunter like you...then I took a bullet to the knee :D
ICastillo 25
You should have played it off and been I was just joking all you guys are nerdy bastards anyways. But it's alright Op I bet those guys really couldn't hit water if they fell out of a boat.
xx1988 15
You totally deserve it for assuming your kiss was prize-worthy. Joking or not, get over yourself!
unknown_user5566 27
You're lucky no one was disgusted enough to shoot YOU to get out of the kiss.
windfuelsfire 10
Who?