Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML
Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML
Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
Today, me and a friend I met in the club were sandwiching this blonde girl dancing, when 5 minutes later she turned around and said that I should get another girl and gently brushed me aside. FML
What just happened?
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, so I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
Shut up
Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML
Top comments
Eaglestrike117 29
Stand up for yourself. She was coming on to you.
ibeinpain 5
Say, "That was a woman?!" I bet that would piss him off.
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Comments (115)
ambymamby 1
Shulda fought bak!
sodapopper 6
Probably a game. Some couples are wierd.
betterthanyourex 2
LOL that must have sucked! He needs to keep her on a leash
sniperchewtoy 2
All your base are belong to us! Seriously, punch him in the throat and take the girl out back.
AngryBlckMan13 2
Shouldv said you were doing him a favor for taking the **** off his hands
Jasonf6 0
Charge that stupid ******* ape with assault and tell him "his" woman started it. Also, how the **** did you know she was someone's gf? AND, since when do we "own" women on this day and age?
ThatsFckdUp 0
Thats fckd up
KyrgyZtanov 2
obviously you must have had the moves if she was with you but this story belongs on nightblend.com
Sk8trlover19 3
I would punched that dude straight back after I got up. That guy needs a life seriously cuz he should have been around his woman
JoelMcKickasas 3
The amount of internet badasses on this page is hilarious. Dude, i know of a girl who used to do that. Her boyfriend and his mates would wait till she started dancing with a dude, then they'd swarm him. If you stood up for yourself with a bit of pride, or even backed off, then you did the right thing. I've bottled enough people, and been bottled enough times to know when to just leave it, and this was probably one of those times.