Today, me and a friend I met in the club were sandwiching this blonde girl dancing, when 5 minutes later she turned around and said that I should get another girl and gently brushed me aside. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I gave my drink to a girl who I got with previously and started to dance with her. She backed off after a few seconds, took my drink and danced with my friend who was standing right next to me. FML
Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML
Today, while at the club, I started dancing with a girl who I had noticed throughout the night. When she turned around she firmly stated, "I'd much rather dance by myself". FML
Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML
Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML
Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML
Today, my friend decided that we should go clubbing together to "catch up". Her version of catching up is me standing beside her making out with some random dude in the parking lot. FML
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
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Top comments
Addy_fml_fml 0
you deserve it on two accounts: 1) going to clubs. 2) sandwiching girls thinking it's going to get you any.
CodySmith 0
Wow, so did you ever think that she might not want some guy humping her ass while she's trying to dance someone?
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Comments (20)
Addy_fml_fml 0
you deserve it on two accounts: 1) going to clubs. 2) sandwiching girls thinking it's going to get you any.
JennaWenna 0
Thanks #1. That's the first thing that popped into my head when I read this.
pharaohasphuck 10
What did number 1 say? It does not show on my screen.
pewp 5
i agree with #6
Trooth 13
I agree with #5
drplat 0
Btw ur a douchebag above and beyond others
kayleighcontrol 7
Owch. **** your life, ********.
CodySmith 0
Wow, so did you ever think that she might not want some guy humping her ass while she's trying to dance someone?
Giorgio272 2
damn you got a small dick. that is all.
pepsie_fml 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
that was me . u r ugly as hell.
justuninterested 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
ummmm do you live in my dorm? cause if that was you that made me stand outside in the snow storm with only slippers, shorts and a tank top on, thanks a lot
anyav3 13
Wtf?