Today, at 2 am on a Saturday, I purposely updated my Facebook status from my iPod so people will see that I posted from a 'mobile device' and think I'm out at a bar having a life, instead of sitting at home on my bed watching movies on my Netflix. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, after working the night shift, I accidentally left my iPod at the office. I woke up later and went on Facebook. To my dismay, I saw some coworker had posted stuff on my wall, such as, "I really have to take a shit!" and "Yes, my tits are real!" FML
Today, I decided not to go on Facebook so people would actually think that I have a life. FML
Today, I posted on my Facebook wall that I'd gotten into a huge bar fight and had the shit kicked out of me, all to avoid having to tell the truth, namely that I'd stayed home all night because nobody invited me out to party. FML
Today, I deliberately snapped a pic of myself and edited it to add to my story, in order to make my ex think I have a life on a Saturday night. FML
Today, to give the illusion that I have friends, I wrote an outrageous status on Facebook, and then pretended it was the result of a friend hacking my page, all in the hope that it would get comments, likes, or at least some attention. Nothing happened. FML
Today, I updated my Facebook status to, "Party at my house this Friday. Like my status if you want to come." After about 3 hours I checked back to discover that the only person who'd liked my status was my grandma. FML
Today, I purposely misspelled words while texting my boyfriend so he would think I was out partying and having a life. FML
Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
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Top comments
calichic101 0
i dont rlly think tht is a fml it just means u have no life
mcleantrain 0
u will have friends some day don't worry!
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Comments (83)
Cassandrra 0
why would you tell people that
ccccjim 0
I do that ALL the time
unmadebed 0
There is nothing wrong with choosing films over beer.
PugnaciousSaint 0
youre gay shut up. no one cares ghat you are a loser
PincheEdgarr 0
uhm okay no one cares.
jayemdoubleyou 1
You wanted to prove you have a life by...posting on facebook?
xlovexsexxmagic 0
on facebook it would have said updated from iPhone and if you have at least the slightest friends they would've known if you had an iPhone or not, and not many bars have wifi, I don't think any bar has wifi. and iPhone can be used on a 3G network so only an idiot would think you were at a bar..bars close at 2am.
chocolatemocha 0
Lol if your first comment was "Did you write this on your iPod".
Mars_Bars_Big_Na 0
what's stopping you bich this ain't an fml
xerikax3 0
Ydi for not having a life. if you wanted to go out to a bar, then just go.