Today, after working the night shift, I accidentally left my iPod at the office. I woke up later and went on Facebook. To my dismay, I saw some coworker had posted stuff on my wall, such as, "I really have to take a shit!" and "Yes, my tits are real!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
Today, I left my phone at work. After returning to the office to retrieve it, I noticed it was not on my desk as it usually is. I went to the front office and found it on the desk, unattended. When turning on my phone, I was greeted by my new lockscreen: a crap someone took in the bathroom. FML
Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I checked my Facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption, "This is what Taco Bell does." FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I mistakenly took a screenshot and then proceeded to fumble my phone. It wasn't until 5 hours later when I recharged it that I realized I had unintentionally posted the screenshot of me on the toilet to Instagram. FML
Today, I found the iPod touch that my mother claimed was stolen at the mall a few years ago, lying on her bed, still logged in to her Facebook. Thanks, mom. FML
Today, I forgot to log out of my Facebook account before leaving for work. When I got back home, I discovered that my brother had gone through and commented "quack" on all my friend's duckfacing photos. She was not pleased. FML
Today, I was going to the bathroom at work. Since I knew it would take a while, I brought my iPod in for entertainment. To bad it disabled me from hearing the continuous knocks on the door as well as the manager eventually picking the lock and busting in. FML
Today, I got home from work after working 16 hours straight. I was naked on the toilet, just about to get in the shower, scrolling through my phone when I nodded off and FaceTimed someone by accident. FML
Today, at 2 am on a Saturday, I purposely updated my Facebook status from my iPod so people will see that I posted from a 'mobile device' and think I'm out at a bar having a life, instead of sitting at home on my bed watching movies on my Netflix. FML
Today, I was using the bathroom and checking Facebook on my phone. As I'm checking my newsfeed, I noticed a new photo upload by my brother. I guess I forgot to properly shut the door to the bathroom, because it's me on the toilet. FML
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Top comments
pizzzah 9
heres a bright idea, put on a password!
Alihb 16
You know, the thing about puns, they have to make sense.
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Comments (92)
pizzzah 9
heres a bright idea, put on a password!
JocelynKaulitz 28
Let's just hope it didn't end up being stolen.
paigexox0 37
I always end up getting annoyed having to put in my password in everytime. Thank god i dont really leave my house, so unless my cat feels like stealing it i have no problems
fortune789 17
Well at least op's breasts are large enough that people question their authenticity.
myusername23 17
Maybe OP is a man.
PterodactylMan 23
That's always a positive, right?
Thatguy334 7
So? if OP is a man, skill the more reason to validate whether or not they're fake
mikeytmxd 4
Lol
Chibi_Kitten 24
#42 I've always wanted to see a pair of manboobs. Now my life is complete!
soveryunoriginal 23
Wow that's a crappy thing to do. I guess you're in a titty situation.
Alihb 16
You know, the thing about puns, they have to make sense.
Lanker 17
#2 Your name goes well with your comnent.
urdirtyolduncle 15
29- so does his profile pic. A big "don't do" sign.
AnOriginalName 19
Way to copy my name, #2.
LittleMrAsian 9
#29 your profile pic is adorable
Crimson_Summer 10
Co-workers are the worst.
World_Burner 13
Wanted to punch one of mine in the face yesterday..! give me an attitude after I relayed a message from our manager.
Rallred32 20
This isn't a pity party, 8.
AnOriginalName 19
But if you have cool coworkers, they're the best. I would laugh it off if my coworkers got onto my Facebook.
World_Burner 13
I will pity party wherever the hell I want but fair enough, I digress.
ronberg 15
never leave your phones / ipods unlocked!
MisterEx 28
Last word was unnecessary. My precious!
imlifeless2 25
I thought it was necessary. otherwise its "don't leave your phones/ipods"... don't leave them what? alone? at work? password-less? at the pool? That last word made the comment relevant to the FML I think.
skychu 18
#44, there's nothing grammatically wrong with saying "don't leave them". It's just another way of saying "always keep them on your person"
1dvs_bstd 41
your co-worker is really mature.. isn't that something high school teenagers who think they're funny do to their friends' facebook profiles?
World_Burner 13
Yeah.. they "hack" each other's profiles.. hack pfft haha
Door_Productions 19
Yeah, since when is figuring out someone's password or using their account "hacking"
BSnapZ 21
#28 figuring out someone's password is most definitely a type of hacking. However, going on someone's Facebook and posting a status because they left it logged in on their computer or phone without a password on it, that it NOT hacking.
hxnnxh 14
#9 It's called 'fraping'.. god this generation sucks
World_Burner 13
#64, stop using IE.. Oh but thanks for insulting me for your own misunderstanding! And that's exactly why this generation does suck.. Oh again, my Computer Science major thanks you, I never would have made it without you repeating what I already knew.
iLike2Teabag 27
You and your coworker must be really good friends. You're practically two peas in an iPod.
larrena2377 26
The best pun I've seen in a while.
colby6666 43
26- The most unnecessary comment I've seen in a while.
LittleBastard 20
As was yours, and mine, and maybe the next guys'!
brandoneyez1 25
Change your password, delete the posts.
MoodiQ 8
now for the hunt to find which coworker did this
Adam5858 17
Did they give it back soon after....or do they keep posting
Michael903 18
It's time to find out what else they did with your phone. Hope you didn't have any pictures of said **** on your phone...