Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Busted
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Deez nutz hurtz
Today, I was about to have sex with my wife, so I walked into our room naked, but then whacked myself in the nuts with the door handle as I attempted to close it. She can't stop laughing, and I can't sit down. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML
Slick move
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Pranked!
Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML
Top comments
ScratchCatPower 32
FMLs that state that someone else "thought it would be funny" to do something to OP tend to automatically be an FYL.
bdub42 8
Seeing as you were meeting her parents, I don't really understand her logic behind that? I would assume she would want them to like you? Either way, I'm sure they will forget about it, sorry though OP!
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Comments (65)
saffy66 34
Am I the only one who thinks this girl is a total moron? FYI that's a rhetorical question - I never come back to read the comments after I've posted.
ItsAnanya 25
That must have been quite 'a rousing' event for you had you not been meeting her parents, but don't be too 'hard' on yourself, OP. Even if they yell at you, maintain a 'stiff' upper lip as this incident should not cause much 'uprising' but perhaps you should have a chat with your girlfriend about how much you don't appreciate being 'dick'ed over by her. Beware though, she might use 'phallus'y to defend her actions. Have you felt much 'deferens' in your relationship with her, off lately? perhaps this might the 'tip' of the iceberg of certain underlying problems? I'm sorry.
scyth3s 13
This comment gave me an erection. what humorless sticklers downvoted this comment? you're taking bad puns too... hard.
FrostyyFML 15
That's unfortunate fellow Ontarian, but, it sounds like something an Ontarian would do.
Badkarma4u 17
Don't sweat it OP, they were once young too. They probably had a chuckle about it later. Remeber her mom gave her dad a hard on at least once.
vikky538 29
She is making sure to let her parents know why did she chose you!!
amsterdamgirl 20
that's not cool, not cool at all...
zebra3_fml 7
this one really needs an author response explaining what happened next.
tigerbyrn 13
Hi OP here, Her parents were actually pretty cool with it(just gave me a smirk but didn't say anything) and we ended up getting along pretty well. The thing is, my gf pulls off jokes like this all the time, which is what I like about her. Hopefully, I can get her back for this one though :D
metalcrazed 21
Well,at least they're cool people.
NotRussian 16
That's when you immediately think of the nastiest thing. Quick imagine Donald Trump naked!
malikbahaa 21
A grab so quick that u couldn't hide it b4 they saw .... Doesn't take much to get you stimulated does it ????
metalcrazed 21
He's probably a teenager,when I was that age a stiff breeze would get me hard {not literally}
jrm89 9
Your girlfriend's a dick!