Today, after waiting to get home to go to the bathroom, my six year old neighbor popped out and literally scared the shit out of me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was in the middle of a shower, and downstairs I heard my 7 year old daughter screaming "Mom!! Help! I need you right now!" I panicked and ran downstairs, not giving myself enough time to put some clothing on. It was my neighbor at the door. FML
Today, I was visiting my friend's new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughter's. I'm a 37 year old male. FML
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Paper-thin walls
Today, I had to tell my 4 year-old, "I'm wiping my butt right now, I can't get you a drink. Please wait a minute." I distinctly heard my neighbor laughing through the bathroom window. FML
Woah!
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Hey there!
Today, while I was sitting on the toilet, my toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor, who I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML
Today, as I was standing in the checkout line in a store, my six year-old daughter proudly announced to everyone that I fell asleep on the toilet last night. FML
Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
Top comments
hehe_oops 2
I don't understand how you could do that unless you had really runny shit bad luck though, ew btw when you said the kid "popped out" I imagined him popping out of the toilet just before you got there
050294 0
Haha, wow. FYL
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Comments (96)
hehe_oops 2
I don't understand how you could do that unless you had really runny shit bad luck though, ew btw when you said the kid "popped out" I imagined him popping out of the toilet just before you got there
KayBizz 0
^ lmfao @ popped out the toilet
ncurtsak 0
hahaha this one is hilarious but I just love the comments
050294 0
I doubt it was the kid scaring him. The sudden shock of the kid jumping at him probably did. Fear actually helps the body poop. As funny as it is, it actually can happen.
lickmyjock 0
lol i thought this said he pooped and u got scared so u pooped too.
musicmaniac925 0
lol #14 that's rediculous
blastvortex 4
Haha. Now there's the real irony. @OP: Heh. Kids...
madHatter11 0
u mean ridiculous? ... I had to sorry
CheshireWolf 0
Yeh lmfao
manu1357 0
Thats some nasty shit
nevergiveup1234 0
lol
ALegitNinja 0
Well that sucks. If your daughter was out in the bathroom waiting for you to come then you should discipline her.
killabee 0
Daughter=neighbor? How very odd.
pinkandblaqk15 0
why didn't u just do tht in the first place instead if waiting to get home to do it?
yzaldana 0
oh shit! >.<
perdix 31
Wouldn't you feel a six-year-old hiding in your colon? Did you rescue him when he fell in the toilet?
FernandoTorres_fml 0
Pahahahahaha, I just read this comment, then read the FML again. He's right! It DOES sound like the OP is "popping out" a six-year-old. You win again Mr.Perdix...
CallMeHush 1
6 yr olds don't move around too much in there. He thought it was one of the gerbils.