Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on the job. After his mom finally got home 4 hours later, he called her a slut. When he got in trouble for it, he claimed that I taught him the word. Needless to say, I didn't get paid. FML
Today, my dad offered to pay me $40 to wash his car. Needing money to buy a video game, I agreed, and went out in the freezing weather to do the job. I finished the task, only to be paid in Monopoly money. My dad still hasn't gotten over how "funny" his prank was. FML
Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
Today, trying to pocket a little extra cash for himself, my dad responded to multiple babysitting ads on Craigslist, accepting them all on my behalf. I despise children with all my heart. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML
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Top comments
kickazz16 15
That was rude.
thebeautybleeds 17
Why would you even say that?
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Comments (369)
exohazard 6
Even if the father was a prick, that was uncalled for.
petraphotoDOTca 6
ummmm, taking someone's services and trying to avoid paying for them makes the dad more immature than the OP.
uprising_fml 0
must I explain ? the dad was making a reference to a gum commercial and he was KIDDING ! **** .
superpoptart 24
There are so many stupid people in this world.
grands138 4
How are you trusted with children?!?!
Steve95401 49
Would OP want someone talking about his grandmother that way? What an asshole!
sectorleader 2
What ever happened to a simple "haha no"?
5t3ff1k4h 47
GENIUS.
uprising_fml 0
I think you mean: DUMBASS DICKWAD ASSHOLE and also: PERVERTED ****
5t3ff1k4h 47
Doesn't anyone know what sarcasm is anymore? Obviously this guy isn't a genius... You guys are all ******* retarded.
emjay1284 2
Yes think that is most definately a cringe moment.
FlyingWhisps 5
Why in the hell would you say that to a man who is about to pay you? Don't expect to get another babysitting job anytime soon, because you are now the trash talk of the block.
Nickel05 15
Here's the FML we should have seen. "Today, I wanted a nice night out with my lady friend, so I hired a babysitter for my little girl. When I got home, I made a joke by saying to the sitter "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" He said watching my gran inhale a **** would be funnier. I actually let this pervert take care of my child all night. FML"
corydac123 6
This doesnt even make sense, this kid is retarded
uprising_fml 0
the kid is a retard, but it does make sense.