Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on the job. After his mom finally got home 4 hours later, he called her a slut. When he got in trouble for it, he claimed that I taught him the word. Needless to say, I didn't get paid. FML
Today, my dad offered to pay me $40 to wash his car. Needing money to buy a video game, I agreed, and went out in the freezing weather to do the job. I finished the task, only to be paid in Monopoly money. My dad still hasn't gotten over how "funny" his prank was. FML
Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
Today, trying to pocket a little extra cash for himself, my dad responded to multiple babysitting ads on Craigslist, accepting them all on my behalf. I despise children with all my heart. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML
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Top comments
kickazz16 15
That was rude.
thebeautybleeds 17
Why would you even say that?
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Comments (369)
dragondude2 7
R u really that much of a stupid d-bag?
dragondude2 7
P.S. It scowls could kill, there would be one less dumbass retard in the world right now and we would all be happier for it
that_swag 0
If i was that Dad i would beat your ass. Period
ZXDriver 0
I hope you don't think anyone is going to feel bad for you.
Bless23 0
You could have just said no...
MineIsBigger 5
one thing bothers me about the whole situation. the op has been referred to as male multiple times one here. how do we know the op isnt female?
boner_93 2
(Name tag for OP): Anonymous (man) problem solved.
fmlurlife 0
Hahahahahahahahahahaha
MineIsBigger 5
i dont quote understand the logic but im just gonna assume the op is female cuz no one in their right mind would hire a male sitter...unless the dad really was out of his mind considering he referenced a stupid ass trident ad to begin with
5t3ff1k4h 47
Um... guys are just as good at babysitting as girls are. As long as you're mature and volunteer to handle some kids, you're in the clear and eligible to babysit. Seriously, what's wrong with a dude babysitting if they can do it just as well? Asshole.
winterxroses 3
That's a good was to prove to Daddy that you're responsible enough to take care of his little girl. Good job on not joking back in a mature and appropriate manner and declining intelligently. I hope he fired you.
crackerjack13 0
Man **** these other douchebags. Way to go!!!
bischkeboy 3
Well. There goes your resume reference.