Today, after having my jaw wired shut for 2 months, I finally got to eat. During the first bite of my sandwich I pulled my jaw out of place. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I lost a tooth and got my jaw wired shut after my toddler managed to break my jaw by whacking me with a plastic toy. Hello at least 8 weeks of being unable to talk while only eating meals that have been thoroughly blitzed into a liquid form first. FML
Today, I finally kicked my awful nail-biting habit. All it took was a fractured jaw. I haven't been able to chew anything for two weeks. FML
Today, I went to my favorite burger joint. Upon taking the first bite of my burger, I dislocated my jaw. The employees had to call 911. FML
Today, I got a tooth pulled out. I now have a hole connecting my mouth to my nose. Drinking and eating is whole new experience. FML
Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML
Today, I woke up from my wisdom tooth surgery… while they were still sawing my jaw. I had such a bad panic response that they also cut my lip, so I have stitches inside and outside of my mouth, as well as the haunting crackle of bone being removed from my skull stuck in my head. FML
Today, I had a dentist appointment in which a nurse numbed my mouth. After coming home, I took a nap in which I unknowing bit through my top lip. I physically can't speak. FML
Today, after finally working there long enough for medical and dental insurance to kick in, my employers decided we should part ways. Then, while I was eating dinner, my crown popped off. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to have a tooth pulled. The day before, I was too anxious to eat anything, so I went in with an empty stomach. There were complications during the extraction and now I'm not allowed to eat for the next 24 hours. FML
Today, my idiot husband broke his jaw and had to have it wired shut. I just caught him trying to fix it in his shed because he cut the wire with bolt cutters so he could, of all things, eat a steak before it went bad, then tried to close his jaw again with fishing line. FML
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Top comments
track69 3
wow that's terrible I'm sorry
scottovious 0
That sucks. Jaw pain is horrid. So Sorry, I hope it gets better...
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Comments (104)
TheRealLori 0
Ouch, hope you feel better and heal up fast!
iLoveMisaCampo 0
i too went thru living a couple of weeks with my jaws shut and i must its a good way to lose weight! haha but yeah fyl.
FuttBuck 0
bonerlicious picture D: kthxbai
YourMomsFml 0
no one cares about glasses nerd
heyred 11
I'm pretty sure that you were instructed to eat softer foods first to build up your jaw strength again. So, YDI.
odexy 12
I'm pretty sure you don't know what you're talking about. When asking my jaw surgeon what foods I should eat after surgery he told me 'whatever you can put in your mouth.' Yes, it was creepy when he said it but the point still stands. Also, how much softer can you get than a sandwich?
bv110 2
Soup, DUH!
inthemillions 0
"How softer can you get than a sandwich" ... Wow? Really? Ummmm baby food, soup, mashed bananas, anything blended, etc. etc. etc. A sandwich is no where near soft, unless it's pb&j, which still requires a lot of chewing and jaw movement.
csv6598 0
how did you stay alive for 2 months without eating?!?!
kellandj2019 7
You blend just about everything! :)
skyeyez9 25
This fml made me think of the scene in "The Rite" where the professor showed the class apic of a man whose jaw was dislocated. It was nasty.
skyeyez9 25
37: by shoving hamburgers thru her nostrils. duh
shylodragon 0
lmfao!
mixedbreed1 0
Damn! What u eat some strong ass bacon
FMLMaster2010 0
hb brushing ur teeth?
vclare 0
imagine his breath after two months!!
jayz9 0
Oh damn i feel u