Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML
Today, I'm so sexually deprived, I got a boner from undressing a mannequin at work. FML
Today, I was at the breakfast table when my sister started eating a banana. Before I knew what was happening, I'd somehow popped a boner. I had to wait for her to leave before I could stand up. FML
Today, I was at a concert and an older man offered to let me stand in front of him because I'm short. It wasn't until the show started and people were jumping around did I realize he had a boner and was repeatedly bumping into me. FML
Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML
Today, I randomly got a boner while modeling a character's butt in animation class. FML
Today, it was the third time in a row someone has lost a boner inside of me. FML
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Today, I popped a boner while my braces were being tightened. FML
Today, I saw a guy with a "free hugs" poster. Since nobody else was hugging him, I decided to. He had a boner. FML
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Top comments
Xx6RoseThorn9xX 5
your dingdong can see the future ;)
straz123 2
Ohhhh. fyl bro.
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Comments (291)
straz123 2
Ohhhh. fyl bro.
Ellifish 2
At least they weren't old men...
2ndSucks 15
Maybe they were impressed by your size?
WellThatSucksMaj 0
say cheese ;)
dolphincheddar 10
were they playboy bunnies? cuz if so, your a lucky bastard
NastyNinja31 0
the coffee got him hot
supimnyancat 9
Embrace your boner and show it off to them.
0D0R0 4
Did their vaginas get wet after they saw it?
ColorfulDonut 7
That's when you stood up and your boner knocked the the table causing a candle to fall of the table an land on your shorts thus you learned that, yes, pubic hair is still flammable.
explodingmuffint 0
I must have a small penis seeming as my boners in public aren't very concerning.
Andrew1122 0
hahaha I just imagine this guy as an old creepy man in basketball shorts and the two attractive women are 15 year old girls
mboehm88 3
104 - that's a comment that sounds more like an FML
Vonneil 0
I bet it sucks to be you right now !
YFDIOP 0
did you do it? lol
Blackhandles 0
Be proud of your boners. They show your not a zombie yet.
bubby221000ify 0
Sam Adams is a freaking boss!
urdirtyolduncle 15
Stand up and salute the Captain, Private!
enonymous 9
Every1luvboners didn't you tell them that!? also if it's big enough take the picture using the boner on the shutter. Chicks dig it
theboxman 1
sucks to suck!
Yodaevil 4
say "wow, you girls are impressive! got my wood rollin in two seconds, let's say we go. ack to my place for those pictures!" yeah, doesn't work for me, but if it helps one man get a threesome... all my work is for not!
lol32360 0
HIS PENIS IS PSYCHIC!!!! :O!
freshV43 0
I'd just bang dem hoes!!
toastyjustice 5
QUICK, TUCK IT UNDER THE WAISTBAND!
kaykay9080 5
Penis. :D
Mr_Saikaly 35
that is really embarrassing
hydef14 2
I do hate getting random boners but still can be fun!
XAnNiHiLaTiOn 6
Tuck N' Go my friend...
ChickenDoggiesWh 0
it's like a boner spidey sense x)
Jonscarl 0
sounds to me like it wasn't random
maddylovesu 5
completely random??
SittingInTheSky 6
I think that when people get random boners it's very flattering. No i'm not a **** Yes i would snog the OP No i don't know what OP means.
srayray 5
sorry but that's kinda funny!don't worry I'm not making fun of you it's just it's funny and I feel so sorry for you!:( :)
Cupcaken 0
Want me to read your palm? Just let me unzip and I'll tell you how many babies we're gonna make.
dolphincheddar 10
that's my pic you raging octopus ******
nixter5 18
yeah what are you doing??! you copied dolphincheddar's picture!! you just broke so many unwritten rules. I'll see that you get banned from FML for life, for copying one of the greats of this site.
BShady96 0
nice doggieganger
dolphincheddar 10
10 how many babies?
FFPulley 9
raging octopus ******.... you sir, are a genius.
ifailsobadly 18
Haha, kill his ass. But seriously, this is where you play the 'IM PHOTOPHOBIC' trick and dive under the table. They wont know photophobic isnt a real word. :P
Mythekos 0
49, Oh how your stupidity shows. it's not even your pic. You don't own it.
wolflover44 5
It has a different saying on it anyways... So what if it's the same dog, mirror reversed. And if you didn't take the damn picture, it ain't yours. Get over it.
tyty22796 0
damn assholes, it is his pic...how do u know he didnt take the pic and put it on the internet who are u to judge...all u haters are raging octopus vaginas TOO!!
eog314 0
the stupidity of people on this site make me laugh.
dolphincheddar 10
it's my puppy. so gtfo
sk1ml1fe 0
lol
Xx6RoseThorn9xX 5
your dingdong can see the future ;)
emilylovestalor 0
lol!!!
ppatty 0
win lol
skizzlerz 0
My thoughts exactly. It sensed them walking your way and wanted to show them what they could have ;) haha
Emmy_The_Great 2
"dingdong" ha.
R4P7OR 2
hahahahahahahahaahaha
jonn090 13
his ding dong needs to be tapped
futtbuck101 1
Threesome?
ironhead_fml 20
lol! great one!!
Baller18511 0
hahahaha
tigerchick234 0
I like ur picture
iAintEvenMad 0
Awkward..
EatnBeef 7
no reason boners always showup at the worst times...
iAintEvenMad 0
True that.
iAintEvenMad 0
Especially in church.
fadingfaith 4
Why would they want their picture taken at a coffee shop?
kiaralove53 0
They could be from out of town? Who knows.
thewife5 19
maybe they are old friends and ones visiting town so they had a quick cup of coffee and chatted a bit.. or not
CaptainPickles72 18
Or could be those people who like to take random pictures in stores to put on facebook for attention.
gchartier90 0
maybe it's the coffee shop they met in and they just came back to relive good old times
portcaveman 5
your eye is berry beautiful
rdvfyubuyg 1
yea I agree with -14 maybe they're from out of town!
sara_saturday 5
maybe they saw the boner from across the room and wanted him to give them a better view
xleanne_aLly 23
wow. number 6 what kind of mascara do you use?
Daboomboom 9
well why do chicks take pictures of themselves in bathrooms?
pixelebrate 0
6# meh, you took a pic of your eye why?
captainmcp 0
me and my best friend take pics everywhere all the time. so do lots of ppl
wierd1919 0
tourists xD the best coffee in the world :o
jrsylilballer6 7
at least they know you're interested ! narb=no apparent reason boner
BostonBear 33
haven't herd narb in awhile haha
kcutie 0
random? r u sure? lol that's hilarious. maybe you just really like coffee. ;)
Jaxx66 21
or he thought of a really good come on! 'hey ladies. let's go to my place and play 'photographer'!
Saltime 0
A random boner? I get turned on by nothing too.
_Oblivion_ 12
thats just awsome to know
Saltime 0
It is! One day, I'll be walking down the street, and we'll cross paths. Now, if you didn't know that I get turned on by nothing, well, let's just say you'd fly back about 20 feet. But, because you know, you'll have the sense to dodge it and avoid the situation.
Llamassss 21
Schwing!
ollierobs 0
Batta Batta
partyfool2011 4
Go watch Wayne's World 75
Llamassss 21
Thank you, 181, exactly what I was going for. :)
foilindo 0
show off!!! lol
jkrupili12 0
same that is horrible
Bloodberry 0
more like "say ****"