Today, after finishing work, my friend was having a party next door and my driveway was blocked. I parked six houses down and went to the party for 20 minutes. After coming out after three beers, I went to move my car back to my house and go to sleep. I got a DUI for driving 30 feet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink and I declined telling him that I don't drink because alcohol makes people act stupid and crash their cars. He then saw me back into a car parked on the street and shatter my backlights as I reversed from the driveway to go home. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, while driving home after the legal curfew, I narrowly avoided a police roadblock and backtracked a mile to drive home another way. I then ran out of gas a mile away from my house. FML
Unfair
Today, I got a ticket for being drunk in public. I was walking a couple of blocks from the bar to my house, because I didn't want to drive drunk. FML
Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML
Party girl
Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML
Today, my best friend broke up with her partner. In retaliation, he got drunk and stole my car, then crashed it into a neighbour's house. Then after dealing with the police who didn't arrest him, he and my best friend made up and went to bed. FML
Oh what a night
Today, I attempted to make a good impression amongst new coworkers by volunteering to be the designated driver at my work party. What did that get me? A backseat full of puke and some idiot too drunk to remember where he lived. FML
Top comments
plethora 3
You drank 3 beers in 20 minutes and then decided to get behind the wheel? YDI, even for 30 feet.
Chocoholic17 0
Should've left your car there and walked home.
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Comments (124)
drinkupgorgeous 0
YDI. Enough said. You could have waited.
lazorzpewpew 0
This thread is full of people with the reading comprehension of a 2-year old. Read and understand the whole thing before posting YDI. 3 beers (not enough to get an adult "drunk" or render them incapable of driving 30 feet), moving his car a few houses down into his drive-way.
Kristoffer 35
I agree with #1. Definitely should have waited. And to #57 - "three beers" is not only rather vague, but also it's not a given that you won't be impaired. It depends on a lot of factors including your tolerance for alcohol and body mass. Also, your tolerance for alcohol has no bearing on whether you get a ticket for DUI/DWI. It's based solely on your BAC compared to the legal limit.
F_A_I_T_H 0
Um, ok. DUI means Driving Under the Influence. Did you smoke pot at that party as well?
Lexia_fml 0
You don't have to be drunk to be "under the influence". Because a lot of people will think they're not drunk, when they have enough alcohol in their system to slow their reflexes, etc. What's the big deal with 6 houses down anyway? YDI
linzhart333 8
but this dumbass couldnt have waited? really?
lss282 0
All of you self righteous retards need to ask yourself this question... would you have waited? Likely that he wasn't wasted, and even less likely anyone would have been pulled over in 30 feet. Instead of looking back in hindsight and passing judgment on the poor bastard, admit that ANYONE in that situation would have driven the car. The cop was being a DOUCHE.... Y definitely did NOT DI
Finnboghi 0
Hate to break it to you, but 3 beers is enough to get you 75% of the way to the legal limit. If you're a heavy drinker so your body is used to processing alcohol. And you are a 200 pound man. Also, I would put forth that the OP is relatively young, maybe 18-22, and with the new licensing systems, there is a 0 tolerance policy. FYL for only going 30 feet, but YDI for not waiting until the next morning.
kisekileia 0
Actually, three beers will put pretty much everyone's blood alcohol level over .05, which is enough to affect your driving and enough to be considered impaired in some places. (Not sure about California.) YDI.
stuartlex 0
3 beers is more than enough to put just about anybody over the legal limit. Also if the party was next door as he said why didn't the guy just walk his lazy ass over there instead of driving and probably parking even farther away? definately deserved for being an idiot.
barryman 0
#129 you actually win the idiot award for your lack of reading comprehension skills. The OP said his/her driveways was blocked and he/she was therefore unable to park at home. So he/she parked 6 houses down. Well done asschap.
everyoneisstupid 0
Everyone on here is retarded and needs to learn the law. A DUI means that you are under 21 and your blood alcohol level is more than 0 but less than .08. If your blood alcohol level is over .08, no matter how old you are, then it is a DWI. If you are 21 or older and your blood alcohol level is more than 0 but less than .08, then it's nothing.
spamky 7
@138: 2 things, first: DUI is a DWI, it means you have a BAC of 0.08 or more and were driving. Driving with a BAC below 0.08 but above 0 is a DWAI (driving while alcohol impaired) and is also a fine and ticket, just not as severe as a DUI. OP deserved it for not seeing the cop sitting there while he stumbled out to his car to move it and/or driving bad enough in 30 feet that a cop can tell that he was intoxicated.
serb77 0
omfg you guys are so ****** dumb, first of all what the **** do u mean wait? the party could last to 4 in the morning and the op could have to wake up early for work or something. secondly, the op didnt walk not because heshe is lazy but because heshe would get a ticket and fine for parking on the street overnight. dumbasses
missmarie97 0
you totally deserve that!
Kaylataylor 0
hahaha
jjames67 4
oh my god I swear you're all retarded.
alliewillie 22
Ok so I have a question: you moved your car 6 houses and 30 feet. You're neighborhood has a house every 5 feet? Second, YDI for not waiting. Studies show even ONE beer can impair you depending on your tolerance, and 3 is more than enough to put you over the limit. You're driving while over the limit, you get a fine. Doesn't matter if it's 1 mile or 100. You just as easily could have moved the car in the morning.
redhedsaysrawr 18
#77: twelve year olds GTFO..... -_-
TheJerkyMonster 2
Well #129, congrats on the award. Although a self-apointed award seems less prestigious.
sulitak 27
dear #96: **** you Yes, I would have waited. and when I host parties at my house I make sure that no one tries to drive ANY distance drunk or impaired. its common sense. That cop was NOT being a douche, they were doing their job. and I don't ******* care if it was a short distance. And yes, I expect people to think "oh but once the cop saw the license they would've known he was almost home." I've been at many parties where someone who lives close will volunteer to get more beer: so there's no way the cop could 100% known the person wasn't on a beer run. and 3 pounded beers CAN put you over the limit... Just like drinking it from a baby bottle can.
dewoe 14
He could have left it there till the next morning..
Chocoholic17 0
Should've left your car there and walked home.
SaintJimmy 0
I've heard this story somewhere before. It was a little different but still the same story.
genius_man16 1
yeah, the one where the kid drove 100 ft to drivers ed this stuff is bullocks, how do you get pulled over in such a short distance? 30 feet is the distance between 2 driveways for ***** sake
axislave 0
Maybe a neighbor called in a noise complaint and the cops where driving past and just see this dude getting in his car and then they were dicks (like 95% of them are) and pulled him over to give him a breathalyzer and then a DUI.
phatdaddy 0
Then again, maybe as they were pulling up they noticed someone stumbling to his car, have trouble finding the right key, not signal while leaving a parallel parking spot, and maybe have crossed the center line. That can all happen in 30 feet. The cop may also have been a douchebag and illegally profiled him.
SilverBallet 0
Cops are just trying to do their jobs. They can't make a living if certain quotas aren't filled.
phatdaddy 0
The quotas are wrong in the first place. If there isn't enough crime, instead of being tahsnked for doing a wonderful job cleaning it up, officers are now forced to find it where it doesn't exist, or make it happen so that they can nab you for something. That's why cops tailgatge people these days. They're just hoping you'll get nervous and make a mistake.
blondieboo411XoX 2
I hear you. I got one in Cali for moving a few feet over cause there was a fight by where I parked my car and I wanted to keep it from getting wrecked. Stupid Cali cops.
firepowahhx90 0
Ydi, same like number 1. you could've waited.
irishdubr 0
YDI
291togo 0
You deserved it. Plain and simple, you're retarded for drinking and driving. You should have just walked to the party.
DingoCJ 15
YDI for not being able to walk the line
Doopliss 0
Drinking is drinking, YDI.
L0veh8te 0
YDI, You should have Just walked in the first Place and leave your car their, you lazy ****.
Juggalette_623 9
is this a re-post? there was one identical to this about a week or so ago.