Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought about going to visit an old girlfriend of mine with hopes of getting a little head. Unfortunately, I didn't know it would be head lice I'd get. FML
Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I are so close that we share everything. This now includes his head lice. Thanks, dude. FML
Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML
Today, this guy I like let me wear his favorite baseball hat that he never takes off. I returned it to him later, only to find out I have lice. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to take a break. At least she gave me a parting gift. Lice. FML
Today, I found out my best friend has a massive head lice infestation. It wasn't until after I'd used her hairbrush to brush my hair that I figured it out. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, I have lice. The dog we rescued infested our house. No amount of showering has made me feel clean, and my bald husband just doesn't understand why I'm so bothered. FML
Today, I realized that the most romantic thing that my boyfriend and I have done in the last month is comb lice out of each other's hair. FML
Today, I finally went on a date with my crush. When he kissed me goodnight, it made me think of a dying slug. FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 35
You may have gotten laid but the price was paid
lily05_fml 16
You should have done it in the shower
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Comments (90)
auntillz1untill9 9
To all those saying "ew gross": lice don't like dirty or greasy hair. They prefer clean soft hair. Plus it doesn't immediately start itching. So she probably didn't know she had it yet and has no hygiene issues like some are suggesting.
LazyLion 12
Better than crabs
worthypegram1 13
...ew
___fishyy 15
At least it's not crabs?
bnbhimp 10
Lice is temporary. Conquest is forever. Unless you spent the night Like a friend then YDI.
thatsme293 28
Does she have crabs too?
Relic256 9
Better than pubic lice
VgForce_fml 3
There is some over the counter product you can get her as birthday present. Try that electric comb.
EarlFug 19
Wouldn't it be lice if we were older Then we wouldn't have to wait so long And wouldn't it be lice to live together In the kind of world where we belong
mccrightp 29
The school my daughter was at ha a lice problem! It doesn't have to be a deal killer. On the other hand, lice suck. I'm just saying it doesn't have to be the end of the world.