Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overcame my debilitating seasickness long enough to have a shower and take a breath of fresh air on the cruise ship balcony. Then as a reward, a passing seagull shat on my head. FML
Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML
Today, I drove to the beach for an hour to relax before returning to the intense workload of midterms. A kid walking by threw a cracker near me and I was instantly attacked by a group of seagulls. FML
Today, I was out riding and a seagull pissed on me. It got in my mouth. FML
Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML
Today, I found out the hard way what it feels like to have a seagull poo on your face while cycling. FML
Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML
Today, at the beach, a seagull conveyed its opinion of my cigarette by taking a dump on it, putting it out. Seems they have anti-tobacco sniper seagulls now. FML
Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML
Today, I went for a swim in the sea. It was early and I was the only one in the water. I swam out far, then my tummy rumbled big time. Next thing I knew, I'd shat my shorts. It went everywhere. I had to scoop the poop out with my hand and wash it off whilst swimming back to shore. I had to shower afterwards. FML
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Top comments
kings1fan 6
I hear it's good luck!
Streeet_hayley 6
At least you're on a beach and can clean it off..
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Comments (117)
yoshiyakiryu 20
Seagulls are terrible people. If seagulls were people, of course.
idontknowyou123 0
How is this an fml. You got shat on by a bird big deal. Its good luck. Im waiting for a post on mlia saying how awesome your life is after being shit on by said bird.
ThisIsSpicy 2
It was a message from above......
raphanne_fml 33
"Use protection"?
2112mike 4
Good luck!
chels1994 11
at least you can go to the beach -_-
RKD 23
Just laugh it off, op! Don't sweat the small stuff!
HomeAl0ne 20
Good news - it wasn't birdshit. Bad news - remember that fapping sound the seagull made as it flew over you?
HomeAl0ne 20
No, I think this is the start of the latest Lemony Snickets story. It gets off to kind of a slow start.
heralynn1011 0
Shit comes from everywhere .
apet214 10
How unfortunate...
bizarre_ftw 22
Chestier Catpple!!!!! :D