Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overcame my debilitating seasickness long enough to have a shower and take a breath of fresh air on the cruise ship balcony. Then as a reward, a passing seagull shat on my head. FML
Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML
Today, I drove to the beach for an hour to relax before returning to the intense workload of midterms. A kid walking by threw a cracker near me and I was instantly attacked by a group of seagulls. FML
Today, I was out riding and a seagull pissed on me. It got in my mouth. FML
Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML
Today, I found out the hard way what it feels like to have a seagull poo on your face while cycling. FML
Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML
Today, at the beach, a seagull conveyed its opinion of my cigarette by taking a dump on it, putting it out. Seems they have anti-tobacco sniper seagulls now. FML
Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML
Today, I went for a swim in the sea. It was early and I was the only one in the water. I swam out far, then my tummy rumbled big time. Next thing I knew, I'd shat my shorts. It went everywhere. I had to scoop the poop out with my hand and wash it off whilst swimming back to shore. I had to shower afterwards. FML
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Top comments
kings1fan 6
I hear it's good luck!
Streeet_hayley 6
At least you're on a beach and can clean it off..
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Comments (117)
dumple 0
I believe it's actually best worded "shat on"
kristienna 3
That's actually said to be really good luck you know..
The_Instigator 11
Good luck for who? OP or the Seagull?
tennisrapper1 14
Damn of all places on the beach I don't think that you're the seagulls toilet! Time to clean up I guess!
yelz 16
Should've gone for a skinny-dip
perdix 31
In some cultures, that's good luck. Go join one of those cultures and CTFD!
khatyangelz 0
What does CTFD stand for?
redsox99 0
Calm the **** down?
camera123 0
Ydi for being at the beach and not expecting sea gulls .
Daralea 21
Not surprised. Everyone knows seagulls are evil anyway. Literally saw one attack a girl and grab a sandwich from her hand once. Now you know to never close your eyes around them!
freshko21 6
The best thing to do is to laugh it off :) Sometimes the universe has a dark sense of humor, but it is humor nonetheless
Katuski 4
Damn those seagulls.
BuckNekkid 22
wtf is a 'shat'? some kinda hat?
darkmis1 18
It's the past tense of shit.
SanDiegoGirl111 3
It's technically slang for the past tense of shit - I highly recommend you incorporate it into your world :)
darkmis1 18
I think I already told you that it's not slang. The past tense of shit is shat.
superangryandy 2
Oh no its a