Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with the finest educational opportunities I could afford, I dropped her off to start school at the best public university in the U.S. So far the only thing she's learned is what weed smells like. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my 18 year-old daughter to buy half a dozen donuts. When she brought them over, I opened the box and discovered the dozen donuts were all cut in half. She just got accepted into a prestigious private university. FML
Today, after being accepted into the college of my dreams, I found out that my mom has spent all my college savings on alcohol over the years, and she says that it's my fault for not "helping her get help." FML
Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML
Today, it's my 37th birthday. I was an honor student in high school, went to a top university, accruing a bunch of debt, and got trapped working jobs I hate. All because my teachers told me I was too smart for state school. The drug addicts I went to high school with live a more stable life than I do. FML
Today, I excitedly told my mom how I got accepted to the master’s program of my dreams. She decided now would be a good time to proudly repeat for the millionth time how she gave up a full ride to the Ivy League to marry my father, and I ought to be a "good woman" and do the same. FML
Today, after spending years volunteering at community theatres and being accepted into a prestigious university for theatrical design, my public high school gave me a scholarship. All my mother could say was, "I'm sorry they wasted their money on you." FML
Today, I learned that my daughter pocketed the money I'd paid so she could go to college. FML
Today, I'm in a US college. I could've gone into a trade or internship, but no one listened. Now, while my parents brag to their friends that their child has a degree, I'll probably be spending the rest of life in crippling debt, sleeping on the side of the road, and begging strangers for table scraps. FML
Today, I received my acceptance letter to one of the most prestigious universities in the US, as well as a nice scholarship. I was so proud of myself, I eagerly showed my dad, hoping he would shed a tear or two. His only words were, "Just get a job so you can get the hell out of my house." FML
Today, the “lowlifes” from my school who smoked weed are all doing better than I am. Some have family connections in real estate or marketing; Others banded together and started now successful brands. My strict parents forbade me from socializing where I best fit in, so I have zero connections. FML
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Top comments
Dalliance 4
I am not surprised.
thatnucca 36
At least it's weed and not sweaty man balls...
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Comments (128)
DMC_Hotness 0
It's college, tightwad. If your daughter's worth a damn, she'll figure things out.
maxeeman111 5
shes done well in my opinion! (not that its hard to smell weed lol)
dreamering 16
Hopefully she will earn a PHD about the benefits of smoking weed.
vIBC 0
**** weed and potheads
sambam_454 0
weed is useful for other things, my parents put it in alcohol and when their back hurt they rub it... it makes them feel better. But I agree that it is bad to overuse it or smoke everyday
T0bieLar0ne 4
**** you, and you.
israel12 0
Poser what you think wolf gang doesn't smoke weed haha
israel12 0
36-hey I didn't know that that's interesting I'ma do that one day
vIBC 0
So i listen to a lot of music that talks about weed dosent mean shit. And by the way Tyler is actually straightedge so learn your shit
LiterOfCola 16
Haha idiot, you think webby, cudi, and currency aren't potheads?
chellexx 0
I knew what weed smelled like in junior high and I grew up pretty sheltered...I'm surprised your daughter didn't know what weed smelled like till now. It's really weird, actually. Was she home schooled? And locked in a cave?
xleanne_aLly 23
Thats what I was thinking.. most of the kids around here are starting to smoke on gr.6
o76923 8
You dropped her off today. What did you really expect her to learn on move-in day?
cbz88 0
Fkn hate parents like you OP...fair enough, your kid sounds like he's on the wrong path but you don't pay for the 'finest education' and simply come up with all these predisposed expectations...you've simply done what most would agree to be a good thing by your kid but you should never have expected your kid was going to come out any better or with a superior level of education simply because you put him in a private school. Obviously your kid hears all too much about how he's a failure in your eyes and how you've spent all this money and it's been wasted on him...don't know why he'd be depressed!!!
gabrielleangeliq 0
This sounds personal.
T0bieLar0ne 4
Well don't worry, since she goes to Cal she will also learn to be an inconsiderate bitch who looks down on anyone who doesn't go to Cal but still has an inferiority complex because her GPA is nowhere close to the Asians setting the curve in every class. Weed is the least of your worries.
Majstr 23
Is this hippy college?
SGT_DBL 15
What did you expect from the broken education system in our country?