Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with the finest educational opportunities I could afford, I dropped her off to start school at the best public university in the U.S. So far the only thing she's learned is what weed smells like. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
They'll have anyone these days
Today, I asked my 18 year-old daughter to buy half a dozen donuts. When she brought them over, I opened the box and discovered the dozen donuts were all cut in half. She just got accepted into a prestigious private university. FML
Boozehound
Today, after being accepted into the college of my dreams, I found out that my mom has spent all my college savings on alcohol over the years, and she says that it's my fault for not "helping her get help." FML
Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML
I didn't choose the thug life…
Today, it's my 37th birthday. I was an honor student in high school, went to a top university, accruing a bunch of debt, and got trapped working jobs I hate. All because my teachers told me I was too smart for state school. The drug addicts I went to high school with live a more stable life than I do. FML
Thanks ma
Today, I excitedly told my mom how I got accepted to the master’s program of my dreams. She decided now would be a good time to proudly repeat for the millionth time how she gave up a full ride to the Ivy League to marry my father, and I ought to be a "good woman" and do the same. FML
Excuse you?
Today, after spending years volunteering at community theatres and being accepted into a prestigious university for theatrical design, my public high school gave me a scholarship. All my mother could say was, "I'm sorry they wasted their money on you." FML
Rip off
Today, I learned that my daughter pocketed the money I'd paid so she could go to college. FML
End student debt
Today, I'm in a US college. I could've gone into a trade or internship, but no one listened. Now, while my parents brag to their friends that their child has a degree, I'll probably be spending the rest of life in crippling debt, sleeping on the side of the road, and begging strangers for table scraps. FML
Today, I received my acceptance letter to one of the most prestigious universities in the US, as well as a nice scholarship. I was so proud of myself, I eagerly showed my dad, hoping he would shed a tear or two. His only words were, "Just get a job so you can get the hell out of my house." FML
Networking
Today, the “lowlifes” from my school who smoked weed are all doing better than I am. Some have family connections in real estate or marketing; Others banded together and started now successful brands. My strict parents forbade me from socializing where I best fit in, so I have zero connections. FML
Top comments
Dalliance 4
I am not surprised.
thatnucca 36
At least it's weed and not sweaty man balls...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (128)
latinjukes 2
Can't blame him, in this economy.
hotdyegrl 0
ummm... obviously she has worked just as hard to get there... lots of smart/successful people smoke weed.
justanotherhuman 21
^ fact.
yankeebaceball 1
Does anyone realize that this was posted by 'bongbabe'?!?!??? My guess is that this is her own story, told through a more 'interesting' lens...
dreadfullife 1
Could she have not made it to a better university?
queenb1621 21
Dude thats what college is all about
IloveyouJon 11
I learned that when I went to my first concert
Pixeh_fml 0
I'm a Berkeley freshman too... Class hasnt started yet, calm down. And if she didn't know that til now, you were a good parent
Scuba___Steve 0
Honestly you're a complete moron if you only say weed is bad because you know it is illegal and the government tells you it is harmful. If you have done no background research or have no firsthand experience, then you have no right to bash it. If you bash on smoking bud because it is dangerous or illegal, I hope you don't speed, drink alcohol, eat like a hog or any of that because it's just as harmful, and you'd be one hell of a hypocrite.
xgetxbentx 13
That's not necessarily a bad thing, now she'll be able to tell if it's around. Sorry lady, but it's high school, no matter how prestigious of a school you put her in, she's going to learn things like that and probably even experiment with them. It's a part of growing up and you're lucky she went this long without knowing that. As long as she keeps her priorities in order and her grades don't slip, don't worry about it.
xgetxbentx 13
I definitely meant college, not high school, granted that is when most kids start learning those things.
lilly37a 1
*puff puff*(;